Abused

11: Tylers aftermath

Tyler was lonely, his whole world had turned grey and he had nothing. Josh was the only thing he had in life, he provided everything he needed. Not just physical objects, but the love Tyler lacked his whole life. Tyler's life was a mess, he'd been abused his whole life and when he finally loved someone they left him alone for dead. Tyler knew it was a mistake to run away out of anger, but he couldn't just go back there asking for help. He wondered every night why Josh didn't even say sorry, or try to stop him from leaving so fast. Did he even love Tyler to begin with? If he did, how could he leave Tyler out of nowhere after saying how much he loves him... and not even tell him why? Tyler always wondered why Josh did that... was he annoying? Was he ugly? Did Josh even love him? Tyler hadn't contacted Josh since the day he left, 2 months ago. The only place that Tyler had was an alley way... he was basically homeless, living on the streets with just a bag of his things and his phone. He had a job at the nearest Taco Bell, and he was saving up for an apartment so that he didn't have to struggle on the streets any more, facing cold nights all alone in the alley ways. It reminded him of cold April nights, when his parents would force him to sleep in the concrete corner of their backyard, where he was at his most vulnerable. He would shiver in the cold air, and he'd be afraid of monsters crawling up and grabbing his unprotected feet. He was only an innocent 9 yeas old boy, who did nothing to deserve a punishment. But that's not what he was raised to believe. He snapped out of his flashback and began to cry. What did he do to deserve such an awful existence? He buried his face into his dirty palms, and let out ten minutes of harsh sobs. He should have let Josh help him, even if they weren't together it would be better than being without Josh AND on the streets in a strange town. Running away was a huge mistake, now he was on the run and go. Taco Bell knew his situation, so they gave him 2 free tacos a day so he could live until he could afford an apartment and food. At least this way, he father will never know where he is when he gets out of prison, and he will never hurt Tyler... or Josh... again. Tyler never had anything to do, since he left his ukulele with Josh, so he worked full time. The only time he wasn't working was when he was sleeping... and he didn't get a lot of sleep these days. He hadn't told Josh where he was or texted him at all since that night, and they haven't talked at all for 2 months. It was like he died, he morned the loss of Josh. Not his body and death, but his love and being in his arms. He missed waking up every morning, and being showered in love and even showering with Josh. It seems to be an essential, but now he knows it was a luxury. One he couldn't have, because for whatever reason, Josh didn't want to be with him anymore. It made Tyler's heart hurt that Josh didn't want him... because Josh was all he wanted. He would call him and ask for some help... but he couldn't... He couldn't just call him up and ask for help. Besides, seeing Josh again would just make him feel worse, make him miss him more. Why was Tyler's world so full of pain.

It seemed like pain was all there was.