50: Maybes

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Her little heart will never beat on its own. It's too Smol and weak to continue on its own. Her organs will just deteriorate if they keep her on life support, and fail eventually anyway. And if they did take her off life support, she wouldn't make it. Little Jolie, Jolie oh Jolie. Her favourite colour was purple. Tyler signed the organ donation sheet with mercy in the back of his mind. Please god. Has mercy on us innocent. What have we done to earn this punishment? Tyler learned from his childhood that life isn't fair, and you get punished for things that you don't deserve. Her grave was small, like her. It was round.. but it had an emerald carved into it. Her eyes were really pretty green. She would have been a gorgeous woman one day, and a very lucky man would be awaiting at the foot of the church while Tyler and josh walk her down the aisle. Now she's six feet under ground... why is god so cruel? Maybe satan and god aren't so different. Maybe a lot of things... maybe was such an uncertain word, maybe Jolie would have lived. Maybe if the driver didn't drink so much the night before they wouldn't have hit her. Maybe if Tyler was never born he wouldn't be suffering so much. So many god damn maybes. So many god damn sins. So much god damn pain and not enough god damn happiness. What was life? Life was nothing but hell... maybe this was hell. What was life? Who even knew. Life took out a whip and lashed Tyler. That is something life and his parents had in common. They were both cruel and sick. Time doesn't heal, they all say the same thing.
"You'll get better."
"Time will heal you."
"It will be okay."

Lies.

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