Abused

18: Music

Tyler lied awake all night, facing the fact that he has a choice to make. His idea was to sleep on it.. but he couldn't sleep. He couldn't even believe what happened with Jenna, he never thought Jenna liked him that way, he thought that she just viewed them as buds... and now that Tyler thinks about it, he had feelings for her as well. Guess he just didn't notice since he's been so worried about the Josh drama. Tyler knew Josh would always be in his heart... and even if he chose Jenna,  he always wanted to be frens with Josh. Josh was a great guy... even if it was just as friends. Maybe he could have a semi-normal life and move away from emotional pain if he moved on with Jenna. That's when it hit him: He chose Jenna. He never thought he would, but he realized now that Jenna saved Tyler, too. Maybe not from his abusive home, but from the pain of remembering it and also from the pain of kissing Josh. Jenna sacrificed her time to help Tyler every day for the last 4 months, and he fell for her every second of the time.. he just didn't have space in his cluttered mind to realize it. Jenna was the one... he always will love Josh but he thought it would be better to be best frens instead. He would always be Josh's bean boy, forever.

Josh was getting worried, Tyler hadn't texted him for 3 days after not saying I love you back.  His worst fear was coming true- Tyler didn't love him anymore, and he'd have to live with the guilt that it was his fault. Josh was so in love with Tyler, and seeing him unhappy made his heart break.. so no matter what Tyler did Josh wanted to be in Tyler's life always, whether it be as frens or soulmates, he didn't care. All he knew was he'd get as much as he could take, and if frenship was all he could get... he would take it.

Tyler: Hey joshy

Josh: hi my lil bean boy, I've missed you so much

Tyler: I'm sorry I didn't say I love you back... I do love you.

Josh: it's okay Ty.

Tyler: but Josh... there's something I need to tell you.

Josh: this doesn't sound too good.. but go ahead.

Tyler: Josh, I love you. I always have, I always will. Until the end of time. But.. i also love Jenna.. and I feel like it would be healthier for me to be with her. She kissed me, and she loves me back. With her, I can move on from all my problems. It's not like we can't be a part of each other's lives, though. I will always want you in my life, so what do you say, best fren?

Josh: Tyler... I love you too. With every inch of me. I want to be more than just frens.. but I'll take whatever I can get. If frenship is what I can get, I'll take it. Best fren.

Tyler: I'm so glad you understand... I was afraid you would get mad at me and never talk to me again...

Josh: i did that four months ago, and not talking to you for even just 4 months was the most pain I've ever felt. I couldn't not talk to you... I'd never do that to you!

Tyler: thanks, Joshy. I'm still your lil bean boy.... right?

Josh: my lil bean boy. Forever:)

Tyler:<3

Josh::)

Tyler felt like the biggest weight on his shoulder had been lifted by the angels, he was free. Free of his father, free of all worries. He could start a new life like a normal man, living with his girlfriend Jenna, and chilling with his Best friend on a regular basis. This doesn't make his scars better.. but it's better than nothing. It was finally time for Tyler to start a new life, but it would be a lot harder for Josh to move on.

Josh felt like he had been struck in the heart with an axe, his heart was broken. He cried so much that night, he was surprised there wasn't a tsunami in his bedroom. Josh wasn't good with coping, he always did the worst things to himself like not eat for a few days or deprive himself of sleep, he only cut once in his life but he's never really been the depressed type. Sure, he had social anxiety and anxiety in general but he'd never felt this hopeless about life before. That's when Josh had been it hit with the best idea since the drumstick. Music. Music always helped him cope, and he loved playing the drums. He remembered that Tyler was an amazing singer and songwriter, and he could play beautiful melodies on the piano and even ukulele... since Josh never wanted to loose touch with his lil bean boy, he decided. Him and Tyler could be held together with music. They could be a team, they should start a band. It was perfect! That would give Josh an excuse to talk to Tyler, and it could help him cope too. It was perfect!

Josh: TY!! Answer asap!!

Tyler: hey josh.. what's up?

Tyler felt awkward, he knew he wanted to be friends but it would take time to put their love for each other out if the way of their new frenship.

Josh: I have an amazing idea, it may sound crazy but hear me out..!

Tyler: oh god, josh... what is it?

Josh: you play piano, ukulele, and your an amazing singer. I play drums, trumpet and I can do a little background vocals

Tyler: josh...

Josh: we should start a band. I know what your thinking, it's stupid. We won't get anywhere with it, but with our skills maybe we could put them to use so they don't keep going unrecognized!

Tyler had a feeling Josh was just doing this to stay close, but Tyler also wanted to stay close. He knew they wouldn't be successful or anything, he was just a bean after all. But it was worth a shot.

Tyler: what will we call it, then?