cORY THAT IS NOT YOUR CHILD-- YOU ARE NOT ACTING LIKE AN ADULT

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<Dad AU>

Everybody's in the playground today. The kids are playing, except for little Ashlie, who is staying under the shade with Cory because she needs a break from running.

Ashlie: I'm so tired.

Cory: Bitch me too.

Ashlie: What's a bitch? Is that bad?

Cory: *just realizing what he said but if he loses his shit right now, Uni will notice him*

Cory: I-it's a loving/endearing term for a close friend or family member!

Ashlie: Oh, well, thank you. I also think you're a bitch, Cory.

Cory: *trying not to laugh* T-thanks Ash, that means a lot.

Ashlie: *walks towards Uni*

Cory: *notices* Wait, where are you going?

Ashlie: *turns around with a smile* I'm going to tell Dad that he's the biggest bitch ever!

Cory:

Cory: *pfft*

Cory: Y-you go along now.

Ashlie: *skips over to Uni*

Uni: *turns around because Ashlie is tugging at his flannel* Yes, dear?

Ashlie: Dad, you're the biggest bitch ever!

Uni:

Uni: *glasses crack* W-what did you say? W-where did you learn that word from?

Cory: *loses his shit and laughs so loud*

Uni: *glasses break* cory

Cory: Oh shit gotta go *stands up and begins to run* nICK BOY TIME TO GO HOME

Uni: gET BACK HERE YOU IRRESPONSIBLE INCOMPETENT PRICK

Ashlie: *looks up at Tommy* What's a prick?

Tommy: *laughs and crouches down* Now, little Ashlie, prick is--

Dawn and Nick and Jon: *punches Tommy at the same time* nO

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