A Glimpse at my Emotions

FINAL TOWN OF SALEM GAMES BEFORE MY MONTH-LONG VACATION

2017-08-01, 8:00 PM

So earlier this morning I played a few games of Town of Salem--with the Coven expansion, duh--because I doubt I'll be able to play again for a long, long, long, long, long, long time...and I came out with pretty silly results.

First I played as Screw The Memes as Forger, Sheriff, and Guardian Angel (I totally screwed up the GA game because my protection target died the first night and I had to leave to finish up some packing stuff.

Then there came the two most memorable games ever.

1. Hafta P as Medusa (Coven All Any)

Don't ask me about the name, please. I guess that came from the fact that I had to go to the bathroom at some point and then the name popped up in my mind. Get it? Hafta P...have to pee...

Okay I'll stop now.

But oh my god.

First night, I decided to stone gaze visitors. Ended up getting blackmailed, but I stoned the blackmailer and I think one of the townies? I don't remember exactly, but I managed to stone 2 people at once, and I had to say, I was pretty happy.

(the only reason I said I didn't remember was because I only had a short glance at the role list after the game was over. Not to mention, people who get stoned get completely wiped--they don't have a role anymore upon their deaths).

Unfortunately, I did not have time to come up with a death note.

Nothing really happened until night 4, when I decided to stone gaze visitors again. I did not have the Necronomicon, so I couldn't visit anyone specifically to stone them. This time I ended up stoning the Tracker, and I came up with this death note.

We were a 4-man Coven team and one member was killed by the Mafia, and we were down to 4 people left, so it was an easy lynch after that. We won!

The sad part was, I never got to use this will.

2. Hafta Poo as Executioner (Coven All Any)

This game was slightly annoying, in all due respect. There were THREE executioners, and TWO OF THEM (one of them being me) had the same target.

-_-

Anyway. That wasn't the most annoying part.

Every single night, the Mafia ends up doing something to me. First five nights, I end up being roleblocked at night (basically being seduced by some stripper while I'm just lounging around in my bedroom doing absolutely nothing while waiting for the next day to come). And every morning I end up saying, "Whoever has been frick fracking with me must have been seriously stupid."

To be fair, my target was lynched by Day 3, so I won. But that didn't stop the Mafia from trying to do stuff with me. By the fourth night, my patience wore thin.

"STOP. HAVING. SEX. WITH. (Please do not spam this chat)."

Thankfully, the Arsonist got rid of the Consort by setting him on fire. But then that gave way for the Blackmailer to blackmail me practically every night.

What didn't help was, there was a Guardian Angel whose job was to protect the Blackmailer, so I basically assumed at first that the GA's target was actually a good person. Turned out I was wrong. They all thought I was the Arsonist! Thankfully, I was not put up on trial at all--we ended up taking down the real Arsonist and the Godfather (with the help of a late revealed Mayor), and I won with the Mafia. Turned out the Blackmailer became Mafioso after the Godfather got lynched, to be all fair.

Never got to use this will, though.

I'll tell you this ahead of time, if you haven't played Town of Salem before: It's pointless lynching an Executioner when their target is already lynched.

So yeah! That was my interesting...um...Town of Salem: Bathroom edition experience.

Now I guess I'll just back away and calmly go do my business.

P.S. Alan: I LOVE TOILETS