BTS 8th member

Sore Throat and Hate 1

//warning: contains self harm. If you are not interested dont read it//

I woke in the morning felling a bit uneasy in the throat. I washed my self and went down. I had a sore throat and it made it really difficult to talk. I saw that all were getting ready to go to the concert hall as we need to perform today.

"good morning Anna. " Jin oppa

I cleared my throat and started to speak.

" go-ood mo-rni-ng opp-a" i said and took a deep breath.

" What happened to your voice anna" asked jhope oppa with concern.

I tried my best to talk but i couldnt. I tried to speak loudly. I finally gave up. I took a pen and a paper from the side desk and wrote on it.

" I guess i have a sore throat oppa" i wrote and gave it to jhope oppa. He said it to others . They told me to rest for a while.

" you need to rest Anna". suga oppa said and gave me some medicines.

" Tha-nk You opp-a" i said.

" what about the concert we have today" asked v oppa.

" ya thats true what should we do" jungkook asked.

" ok just let me ask PDnim and manager nim" said rm oppa

He talked for a long time and turned to us.

" what did he say" asked jimin oppa.

" He told Anna to take some rest and told us to perform" rm oppa said. All of them looked at me. I smiled at them and said" Op-ppas Do-nt worry i w-ill be fi-ne" i said in my best way but unfortunately my voice cracked.

" just take care ok" said jin oppa. I nod and smiled at them.

They were getting ready for to go to the place. I bid them goodbye and went to my room.

I was getting really bored so i just read my novel. I looked at the time, it was 3pm in the evening. I opened my laptop and started seeing their live performance.

" They really did so cool without me" i thought. They were really doing great as 7 members. I looked at the comments

" At last get a concert without the slut"

" Get well soon unnie."

" she is such a whore using their fame . I am having a lot of fun without her in the concert"

" Dont listen to haters. Just get well soon"

" it is way better to have 7members rather than having that slut in the group"

" She should have just died like her sister"

There were so many hate comments. They couldnt just stop it. I do often get this hate but i never told boys about it. I literally had enough.

" i should just die. If i live and be in this group i might just ruin them. I will give what army wants from me" i thought. I shut my laptop as tears were rolling down my cheeks. I am just a piece of shit. No one was there i was just left alone again. I was suppressing my sob but i couldnt held it anymore. I covered my mouth with my hand as i was slidding down the bed. I was whole a crying mess.

I wipe my tears and went to my closet. I throwed all my things. My room was a mess. I just hurriedly took my pocket knife which i have been saving it for a long time since the first incident

I thought to stay strong but no this had made me completely broken. I went to my bathroom and pulled my sleeve up. I put the knife and cut my wrist. I kept on cutting it till there is no blood left in me. Whole bathroom was covered in blood. Every where blood. blood. blood.....My vision was getting blurred and i just blacked out.

" i guess this is the end" i thought as i hit the cold floor .