UNDER EDITING-Something New || Patrick Cripps

fifty one

I breathe in and out steadily, keeping my mind calm. Just enough for the trip home.

I leave the hospital with a forming purple line along my side and the emotional scars that will continue to haunt me. But I'll fight until they are no more.

Through my conflicting and haunting thoughts I finally arrive home with Jack. I legit throw myself out of the car as soon as we stop.

My chest expands as I breathe with such an effort. I'm so frightened now by being in a car. I didn't know the emotional scars were this bad from the accident, but I know that I'm capable of fighting through this trauma. I just hope it doesn't take long because I can't be feeling this way every time.

Jack reaches me, taking me in his arms as I pant.

"I'm so sorry that you had to go through that." I don't say anything at his words, just hug him back. It makes me feel comforted.

Not long after he guides me to the front door. I know he hasn't planned on bringing anyone to surprise me because there ain't all these cars parked out front. I'm kind of glad, as bad as that sounds.

I want to see Patrick.

The thought is random but so true. It's been hard to get him out of my mind, but it's not unusual. There's just this pull I'm feeling to be in his arms again, and properly. Like it once was when we were dating.

But I don't know where Sarah is now. She hasn't made any appearances in a long while, and I won't deny that it scares me a lot. Patrick hasn't spoken about her since he told me what she was planning. I hope I get to ask him soon.

Jack unlocks the door and pushes me inside gently. The clean smell of the house along with the walls filled with photos of my brother and I when we were younger make me smile, leaving behind the distressing memories from what just happened.

I don't know why, but my hand falls on the wall whilst I walk and trace along it with my fingers. I guess I'm just beyond happy to be home. Being stuck in the same room with painful white walls made me irritated. So to have such freedom again allows a heavy weight to be taken from my shoulders.

Not much has changed. The boys have surprisingly kept the place pretty tidy, but I guess it's because they haven't been spending much time here because of me.

Caleb isn't home yet, but from remembering the boy's training schedule he should be in the next hour. And in that time before he arrives I need to remove the scent of hospital from my body.

"I'm going to shower," I inform my brother with a little too much enthusiasm.

"You go do that," he laughs lightly at my excited attitude.

Even though I probably shouldn't be doing it, I run up the stairs with the scar aching slightly on my side. I don't acknowledge it though when I skid to a stop at my doorway. I automatically smile, walking over to my bed and collapsing.

It's as comfy as I remember and doesn't kill my back like the hospital bed. I close my eyes joyfully. I scream out in pure elation of being in the comfort of my own home.

As soon as I'm done soaking up the softness of my bed I grab some clean clothes and head straight for the shower.

I'm quick to turn it on and get in, letting the almost burning water hit in body. It stings at first, but I relax into it. I scrub at my body as the water drenches my skin. I find myself pausing to look at the scar.

It's still painted purple, but I know that it'll dissipate over time. I run my finger over the raised skin carefully, a little bit of pain emitting from it. I just don't get how this could've killed me on the spot.