Fighting For Us - Book 4

Telling Tess

LENA POV

"It's A Wonderful Life again!! UGHH this is a girl's movie!" Corey yells as I shake my head at him. We had all been snuggling on the couch together watching movies all night as Stef called to check in on us periodically. We all really missed her especially today as I glance over to Stefanie and Callie who are doing their nails with the manicure kit we had gotten them.

"It is not a girl's movie young man. In fact, your dad loved this movie." I admit as he turns to look at me along with Frankie for it was rare I mentioned Will which I knew was unfair but something I was working on.

"Really? He did! I do too!" Frankie says smiling. "What was his favorite part, Mama?"

"The part in the end. Where he realizes the most important thing in the world is family, baby."

"Well, he didn't act like it," I watch my daughter pull her legs close to her chest and curl up in a shell, and I know the signs of sadness as I reach for her hand.

"Oh, baby, that's not true at all. He...he very much did love his family. He was just super sad, love. He was sick, depressed we couldn't help him. But it wasn't our fault, my love. And he tried the best he could. He loved you so much. Both you and Corey." I brush the big tears that are now silently falling down her cheeks as Corey moves to hug his sister.

"I'm sorry, Franks." He whispers as she sniffles softly.

"It's ok Corey. Thanks."

"Mama? Aunt Tess is on the phone." Callie interrupts us, and I frown for I didn't hear the phone ring.

"She is?"

"Yes. She wants to talk to Stefanie, but Stefanie said she's not allowed on the phone without permission."

I nod as I lean in to kiss my little girl and boy before whispering, "I'll be back, babies, okay? But go ahead and start without me." They nod as they snuggle into each other, and Callie sits beside them as I motion for Stefanie to follow me. This oughta be interesting for what better time than now than to talk to Tess.

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I sit at the kitchen table as Stefanie talks to Tess then to Jerry, and from my end, the conversation sounds pretty calm for which I'm grateful. It's not that I couldn't handle Stefanie, but I just wanted the peace to continue especially since it's Christmas Day. But she had been extremely respectful the past few days even if she barely spoke to us now something Stef and I were working on. But Tess had been in the back of my mind in terms of the entire diary issue and I needed to get things off my chest. Regardless of it it was was Christmas or not.

I smile softly as she finishes her conversation and shyly hands me the phone. "Go join the kids, love. I'll be back in there soon."

"May I make them popcorn and hot cocoa Aunt Lena?" She asks sweetly as I take a deep breath. I really need to talk to Tess and not with her listening.

"Tell ya what. That's a long movie. When I'm done, we'll pause it and make it all together, okay?"

"Okay."

I wink at her as she leaves the room, and I nervously place the receiver to my ear. "Hey, Tess! Merry Christmas!"

"Hey, Lena." I hear her soft reply as I now light one of Stef's smokes. "Merry Christmas. How are you?"

"I'm well. Merry Christmas to you as well. How are you?" I ask puffing on my smoke.

"I'm doing okay. Not bad I guess."

An awkward silence threatens to take over, but I refuse to chicken out as I cut to the chase. I need to get this off my chest once and for all and stop being so damn nice. This is my family and Stef is going to be my wife. "So, I know it's Christmas Day, but I have a feeling you've been avoiding us on purpose, Tess. But I..."

"I'm sorry, Lena," she cuts me off rather nervously. "I know you know about the diary and what I wrote was wrong. It wasn't right and what I did was wrong. I had no right to steal Stef. I can't help...couldn't help how I felt, and..."

"That's the issue I have, Tess. You still are writing this stuff down, and your daughter saw it. It left her confused and your little secret isn't so secret anymore, and I tried to forgive you, Tess. I really did. But to see that it's not over in your head is probably more than I can put up with anymore. I get people have feelings sometimes, I really do but...this is...I don't know."

My heart is racing out of control as I say this to her, and it also breaks into a thousand pieces for I didn't realize how angry I still was until I started talking to her just now. I'm far angrier than I even knew, and I can feel the years of hurt finally surface as I talk to her.

Sure it had taken me a good amount of time to forgive Stef but I knew she didn't have these feelings anymore, and that they were possibly never as intense as Tess' were. We were committed to each other and I was very well aware she loved me.

"Lena, I was wrong. I was so wrong! And I know it! You can't blame Stef! It was all me, and you can't blame her now! She is committed to you and I know she doesn't feel non the same way. I know it and I don't want to be the cause of a divide between you, two!"

"Oh, you haven't, honey. We are as close as ever. But let me tell you something. Are you listening?"

"Yes." I hear her sniffle, but I continue before I lose all nerve.

"Stop calling Stef. You wanna know how Stefanie is? You call me. Now, I love that little girl with all of my heart! I love her as my own, and I will not turn her away for anything. But YOU! YOU need to get your shit together once and for all! Figure yourself out! Stop relying on Stef! Figure it out!"

"I'm sorry, Lena..." she cries softly as I tell her goodbye and hang up. Tears are now flowing down my cheeks as I quickly make my way to the bathroom where I cry my eyes out.