The Outsiders Imagines & One Shots & Preferences

months // D.C.

Request for prompt #271 "Why can't you see what you're doing to me?"

Requested by : 

The last year felt like genuine hell. To start it off, in November my boyfriend lost his parents, and I lost the people I called my second pair of parents. Losing them meant Darry had to push away College and become his kid brothers legal guardian. He picked up a second job, and soon Sodapop had even dropped out and started full-time at the DX.

The months following seemed to go by slow, but also quicker than expected. I had continued to college, just going to Oklahoma City, so just under a two-hour drive. At the beginning, it was common I would drive home during the weekends and stay with the Curtis brothers and help Darry out where I could.

I could see the stress Darry was starting to carry around with him, and he projected it into Ponyboy. Sodapop was usually drug into it, and if I tried to jump in, it would only cause Darry and I to argue and I go to my parents house instead, until the next morning when we would pretend nothing down.

It had started to take a toll on me after months. It was nearly summertime when I got the call from Sodapop.

Darry hit Ponyboy and had run off and had been rumored to have killed a soc with Johnny Cade, a good kid I grew up around as well. I drove down the same night and stayed there until they got back. Of course, Johnny and Dallas Winston were in the hospital, and Pony was able to come home, so I stayed an extra night before returning home.

Waking up in the middle of the night to yet another call, this time Sodapop was crying, quietly. I drove down the same night and was welcomed by a teary eyes Sodapop on the porch, wrapped in a blanket.

Johnny died because of his injuries and Dally was shot by the cops.

I made sure Sodapop got to his and Pony's room before I went to Darry's, where he was sleeping, I just crawled in with him until morning.

A week later, we had their funeral and I went back to school for my finals, planning to return for the summer instead of joining some of my newly made friends driving around the states.

During these months, it felt like Darry hadn't wanted me around. Most conversations lead to an argument and the time I spent back in Tulsa, he was working or too busy with whatever it was. Even the mornings I would spend in his chair with him, drinking coffee while he read the paper and I watched Mickey with the others, moved to me sitting on the couch with Ponyboy, and usually sleeping on the couch the night prior, if I didn't go to my parents.

It wasn't until I stood in his bedroom, packing up all of my belongings in tears when he spoke.

"Where are you going?" Darry asked while entering, a towel around his waist. I stayed silent as I turned my back to him, angrily whipping my tears before starting to quicken my pace. "Hey, hey, calm down. What happened?" he whispered while wrapping an arm around my waist.

I thrashed before shoving his arm off me, "Don't touch me" I gritted out while walking to the dresser, opening my designated drawer.

"Don't touch you? Don't- what happened while I was in the shower? You were fine an hour ago!" I spun around, "Was I!?" I shouted with an angry laugh at the end. "Yes!" "Darrel, I haven't been fine for months!" I admit before turning back around to grab more of my clothes from the drawer.

"How was I supposed to know!? You don't tell me anything anymore!" "I don't tell you because you don't care enough to ask me!" silence.

He didn't have anything to say to that, and neither did I. I continued to put my stuff in bags. I was nearly finished packing, even having gotten the shower stuff from the bathroom. Not having missed the awkward Ponyboy and Sodapop on the couch as I did so.

I was working on the closet, the last thing.

"Would you just stop and talk to me for five minutes?" he asked with clear annoyance in his voice. I dryly laughed, "You want to talk now, after months of not? You went that long, you can go a few more minutes" "I wanted to talk to you, or I would have told you!" "You told me by NOT doing it!" I argued while throwing my stuff towards the bed before digging for shoes in the bottom.

"Fine, then I want to talk now" "Too bad because I don't! I tried every day for the last- I don't even know how long! You shut me out, not the other way around, Darrel." "Please just-" I stood, spinning around as I looked at him, walking to my bags slowly.

"What's that thing you told Ponyboy at dinner the other night? Before you three stormed out in a chase? You don't just stop living because somebody died?" he stayed quiet. "Because you did. You stopped everything, things you didn't need to stop!" my voice raised once more as I felt more tears sting my eyes.

"What did I stop that I didn't have to!?" "Loving me!" I screamed back as I finally looked into his eyes for the first time in months. "Wh- I never stopped loving you" "Really? When was the last time you even told me you loved me? Even kissed me, or hugged me? You won't even hold me in bed anymore." He stared at me.

His face was hard, it looked like a mix of emotions. The one I could tell the most of hurt, one I had seen plenty the last few months, along with anger.

I swallowed thickly, blinking and releasing a shaky breath before reopening my eyes to look at him. "Why can't you see what you're doing to me?" I asked quietly.

He stayed quiet, so I looked away and started to grab my bags. As I neared the door, Darry ran to stand in front of it. "Wait, just wait" "Darry I have to go. I told my mom I'd be home soon" "Home... You are home. Right here, with me. Call your mom and tell her you changed your mind. I'm sorry, okay? Just... let me make it up to you, please" I looked up to him as he stared down at me.

He cupped my face with one hand, the other resting on my upper arm. "Please" I stared at him for a moment longer before dropping my bags, "Fine" my voice cracked as more tears stung my eyes. He released a breath and moved to hug me tightly around my waist. My hand wrapped around his bare back, "Next time I have to pack my bags, that's it" I whispered and I could feel him nod as I released a final, shaky breath.

I'm sorry this wasn't very good~~