In This Life (Sequel to 'In Another Life')

5

Colby rolled his eyes, and stood up straight. "She's the one in the hospital bed. She's the one who has to relearn how to do normal actions that we take for granted every day, like walking. She's the one who's going to be in so much pain that the doctor said she ll probably wish she were dead, but somehow, you manage to do this about you. Stop it! It's not about you and your guilt, so just shut up and be there for your girlfriend that you put in the hospital, how about that ?! " I knew my mouth was hanging open at his outburst. First, everyone was quiet, Colby's heavy breathing the only sound in my ears, but Justin eventually spoke. "You're right," he sighed, hanging his head. It was Colby's turn to look surprised. "What?" he asked, his mouth dropping open. "I mean, I know. I know I'm right. Now boss up." Justin kind of smiled at him, and my mind was blown. "What the fuck is happening right now?" I asked in astonishment. This wasn't normal. Last I knew, they hated each other. Now it seemed like they were kind of friends. Justin and Colby laughed a little at my reaction, then Colby started fixing his hair. Memories of Florida, and of watching his videos, sprang to my mind. He was always fixing his damn hair, even when it wasn't needed. I smiled, watching him, reminiscing on easier days. Something was nagging me, in the back of my mind. Some thought I had while I was out, some dream or revelation. I couldn't remember what it was though. "Seriously, what's happening? Are you guys friends or something now?" I asked. They glanced at each other, then back at me. Colby shrugged. "Something like that I guess." Justin took my hand in his. "Seems we have a certain woman's well being in common. Sitting in a hospital room or waiting room with someone for a couple of months will make anyone bond," he joked. I shook my head in amazement. "Wow. Okay. This is weird," I laughed out. "Definitely," Colby laughed. Denise was still quiet, just sitting at the foot of my bed, watching me, then the guys, one by one. It was like she was trying to detect something but I didn't know what. "You okay?" I asked, trying to nudge my foot against her. It kind of worked. She met my worried gaze and smiled. "Yeah T, I'm okay. Don't worry about me. Worry about yourself. You gotta get better, because I can't handle these two anymore. I never know when they're going to be at each other's throats, or when they're friends. I'm tired. You can take over." I laughed, and rolled my eyes. "I kind of like it when they're friends. Less stress." "Can you guys give us a few minutes?" Justin asked, turning his head to Colby and Neece. "Yeah, okay," Neece replied, standing up. Colby frowned but didn't say anything. I could tell he didn't like it but Justin was my boyfriend. I watched him follow Denise out of the room, closing the door quietly behind them. I looked at Justin expectantly. I assumed that he just wanted to apologize again, or say how happy he was or how much he loved me. Things like that, but when I met his eyes, they were clouded and hurt. "What's wrong?" I asked automatically worried. He shook his head and gave me a sad smile. "Nothing's wrong. Nothing for you to worry about really. I just need to tell you something and ask you something. It's about when we had the accident. Is that going to be okay? It won't trigger you or anything?" I shook my head, and bit my lip, feeling a foreboding pit forming in my stomach. "What is it J?" He sighed, and ran his finger through his dark hair. "I hate doing this, but I need to know. I don't want to know because I think I already do, but I don't want to hear it," he replied. "Oh my God, can you just tell me or ask me? You're really starting to worry me," I said, watching his face. Something didn't feel right between us. "Okay, here goes, I guess," he said, meeting my gaze again. "When the accident happened...afterwards, there was so much going on. Do you remember anything from it?" I thought back, digging in my memory, but not able to reach anything. I shook my head. "Not really. I remember the car spinning, then darkness. I remember your voice...and Colby's. Was Colby there?" I asked, getting confused. The memory had just resurfaced, but a vivid memory of me being in darkness, but hearing both of them came to me. He shook his head sadly. "No T, Colby wasn't there. Just me, the guy in the other car, and then the EMTS. I was calling to you, praying you would wake up, but you wouldn't. I was so scared that I was going to lose you, and that it was my fault." I felt sorrow for him, and pain in my chest, knowing how badly that must've affected him. "Oh J, no baby, it wasn't your fault. It was mine. If I hadn't li-" "No, it wasn't your fault. Don't do that!" he said, his voice becoming a little angry, surprising me into silence. "Don't take the blame onto yourself. I did this. I admit it and it's something that I'll have to live with every day of my life." His breathing was labored now as he looked at me fiercely. "That's not what I want to talk about though. You thought Colby was there. You said something to him. I need to know if you remember and if you meant it." Now I was confused. I didn't remember saying anything besides stay, but apparently, there had been more. I shook my head. "No, I don't remember anything. I...I'm sorry," I replied, feeling like I should apologize for whatever it had been. I could see that it was hurting him. "Don't be sorry."