In This Life (Sequel to 'In Another Life')

18

 I could see the hurt pass over Colby's face, and into his pale blue eyes, but he had asked...and I needed to be honest. "I couldn't stay with him, knowing that I still loved you. It wasn't right. Only I can't be with you because I still love him and that wouldn't be right. "  My eyes started to fill with tears. "I want to come to you with my whole heart Colby. It wouldn't be fair to you if I said I'd be with you right now, when I still love him. Nowhere near like I love you." I laughed a little through my tears. "I've never loved him like I love you, but I do still love him. I need to heal from this first. Can you understand that?" I felt like I was desperate, pleading with him to understand and to just give me time. My heart felt like it was in vices, that were just squeezing tighter with every second that ticked by that he didn't answer. Finally, he answered, and a slow, grin crossed his face. "Yes, I can. I love you T. I've waited this long. I can wait a little longer." Relief swarmed my body as he spoke those words, and I closed my eyes for a moment, and silently thanked God. When I opened them back up and met Colby's gaze, my voice was steady. "I do love you Colby. I never stopped. Somehow I fell for you through a screen." I let out a laugh, thinking back to those days, and wiped the stray tears from my cheeks. "Even more crazy, when I finally met you, you fell for me." I shook my head. 'I still don't understand it, but I'm so happy that you did. Through everything, I think I always knew that it was you. It was always you." The look of pure joy on his face at my words, let me know that it so worth it to tell him. Even if part of my heart belonged to Justin right now, I knew that Colby owned it. I had let Justin hold it temporarily, but it would always belong to Colby. "It's always been you too, T. There's never been anyone else that even comes close. When I saw you at that club, I thought that I was imagining things, or that my dreams were seeping through into my reality. There was no way that you could've been there, in my world, right in front of my eyes, like I had dreamed so many times. I knew as soon as I saw you again, that I couldn't let  you go. Not this time. I've waited forever to see you again, to tell you that I made a mistake in leaving, in not pushing to make things work." I shook my head and held up my hand to make him stop talking. "That's not on you Colby. That's on both of us. At that time, there was no way to make it work. We would've resented each other, and maybe even killed the love that we had in the process. It wasn't the right time for us," I replied. He furrowed his brow, and bit his lip before replying. "Is now our time T?" I gave him a small smile, and tried to not react to the pain that had just ripped through my body when I had moved the wrong way. "Almost Colby. I think I need to go now though. I'm not feeling the greatest. I'll talk to you tomorrow okay?" He nodded, but looked worried. "Are you hurting really bad?" he asked. I shook my head. "No, it's tolerable. I think I just need to rest. I love you Colby," I answered. That slow, sexy smile curved his lips. "I love you too baby girl." "Goodnight," I said, before disconnecting the call. I put my phone down on the bed, and sighed, feeling my lips curve up into a big smile. "Let me guess. That was Colby," I heard a voice come from my doorway. I glanced over to see Denise standing there with her arms folded across her chest, a sly grin on her face. "Why do you say that?" I asked, grinning at her. "Because you have that big, goofy grin on your face. When are you just going to put the poor guy out of his misery?" I felt my smile fade. "When I know that I can be completely his without any leftover emotions for Justin." She came over to the bed, and sat down next to me. "Sorry T. You know I was just joking around. I let Justin know that it was okay for him to help though. He said he has Monday off. Sarah also had Monday off, so you won't be here with him alone. That work?" I nodded nervously. "Yeah, that's fine. I don't mind being alone with him, but it will probably be easier to treat him like a friend instead of an ex with her here." "Whassup bitch, are we having a movie night??!!" I started laughing as Sarah slid into the room, her socks letting her glide across the floor. "Hell yeah we are," I replied. Denise rolled her eyes at our friend and smiled. "Can you ever not be extra S?" Kenzie said, walking into the room behind her. Sarah cocked an eyebrow at her. "Why would I want to be boring? So overrated." I started laughing again, and even though it hurt, it felt so good to be happy with my friends. "The Notebook?" Kenzie asked. "NO," I yelled at the same time as Neece. "No romance," I added. "Okay, damn," Kenzie said, holding up her hands in defense. "How about This is the End?" Sarah suggested. "That works. We love a Heaven with Backstreet Boys," I answered. I watched my friends move around my new/old room and set up the controls for the new Smart TV that I had just noticed. "Where did that come from?" I asked, pointing to it. "Oh...um..." Denise stuttered and looked at the other girls. "Brennen bought it for me, but I already have one in my room, so I had it stored in here. When I heard you were moving back in, I figured what the hell," Sarah said shrugging. Something felt off about her answer, but why would she lie about something like this. I shrugged it off, and looked at Denise. "Can you help me to the bathroom first?" I asked, embarrassed that I had to have help.