Transformation: Becoming Ben Solo (A Reylo Fanfic)

Chapter 9 - Hurt

A/N - Hopefully you're enjoying the story so far!  Again, a little more Reylo heat... we'll get there, bit by bit :)

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Several weeks passed without a visit.  She wasn't sure if that was a good thing or bad, but she was starting to miss him again.  Especially after how the last visit ended.  It took her days to get it out of her head, but if her mind drifted at all, it would pop back in.

Its not like she was just sitting around waiting for him to visit.  She'd been busy going on recruiting missions with Finn and Poe, trying to slowly build the resistance numbers again. They'd been quite successful, having brought in more than 100 new members in the last few months.  She hoped that they wouldn't need them – with the changes that Ben wanted to make – that they could find peace with the First Order, sooner rather than later.

These missions were generally fun.  Sure they got into a few scrapes and tight situations sometimes, but that was just a part of life now.  And she was so happy that her and Finn got to spend time together again, as well as getting to know Poe.  Sometimes she'd get a funny feeling from Poe, when his eyes would linger on her for just a second too long, but she brushed it away as her imagination.  He was, after all, a complete flirt with all females!

It was during one of these missions that she tried get a sense of what Finn and Poe would think of a different First Order.  They were sitting in the Falcon, eating their rations at the end of the day, and just hanging out.   She tried to sound as nonchalant as possible when she brought it up. "Guys, do you think this war will ever end?"

"Of course!"  Poe answered. "Once we build our numbers back up, we need to come up with a concrete plan to crush them once and for all!"  Finn nodded his agreement.

"Yes, but the First Order will always outnumber us. They have literally thousands – maybe even hundreds of thousands of members.  How are we supposed to crush them?  Do we try to eliminate and annihilate them all, just like they're trying to do to us?  Many of them are just people – just like us – who happen to be on the other side, the wrong side to us.  Is it right for us to kill them all?" she sighed "It just doesn't feel right to me."

Poe seemed taken aback. "Rey, you do realize these people are evil right?   They kill people! They'd kill us in a heartbeat if we let them.  Where is this coming from?"

Rey just shook her head. "I don't know Poe, but I don't think that all – or even most of them – could possibly be evil.  Finn, you were there – are they evil?   Or just doing their jobs? Misguidedly?"

After thinking about it for a minute, Finn answered.   "I guess I never really thought about what "defeating the First Order" would really mean."  He took a deep breath. "I've always just focused on winning each battle – which means surviving - rather than the big picture.  They took me from my family, and for that I consider them to be evil.  But Rey might be right.   Although there are definitely some truly evil people in the First Order, there are a lot of good people there too – especially in the lower ranks.  And many of them are not there by choice.   I don't think we can just kill them all.  That doesn't seem right."

"I can't believe what I'm hearing!"  Poe spat. "What do you propose then?"

Rey sighed. "I'm not sure Poe, but I do know that we can't keep fighting the same battle again and again.  We're not really changing anything."  She hesitated before saying, "What if the First Order changed how they governed?"

Both Finn and Poe responded at the same time, with a shocked "Whaaat?"  They just stared before Poe continued.  "What do you think Rey, that they're suddenly just going to turn over a new leaf?  Suddenly stop taking over systems and bending them to their will?  Do you not know who their Supreme Leader is?  Let me refresh your memory!  He's Kylo-freaking-Ren!  A maniacal monster who tortures and kills anyone who stands in his way!!"  Poe yelled.