"NO! YOU LEFT WHEN SHE LEFT. YOU LEFT WHEN THINGS GOT HARD BECAUSE YOU KNEW THAT I WOULD TURN INTO YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AND THAT SCARED YOU. FOR FUCKS SAKE YOU PRACTICALLY LEFT ME TO DIE AND YOU EXPECT ME TO HEAR YOU OUT?" She shouted at me, pure anger laced in her voice.
But I could tell she was holding back tears.
I could see it.
"I know you're mad at me, alright? I'm mad at me too. What I did was messed up and-" "Yeah, no shit."
"Listen to me. I left for a reason... I wanted to help your mom with-" "THAT MONSTER OUT THERE IS NOT MY MOM." She gritted through her teeth.
She's definitely changed.
She's more confident now, that's for sure.
She's matured. Not off age, but on pain and past trauma.
And I'm not talking about self esteem. She's more sure of herself now. Not afraid to fight.
"Yes she is, whether you like it or not she's always gonna be your blood mom so stop acting childish and accept it. I know you went through some bullshit and you didn't deserve what you went through but you need to learn to move on, regardless of how bad it was. Sorry that I'm being tough on you but that's the way things are. God would never put you through something that he knew you wouldn't be able to handle. Everything happens for a reason, your job is to find out what the reason was."
"God doesn't exist, speaking from experience. And if he does exist then he's a piece of shit." She mumbled.
How the hell am I gonna get through to her?
"Ariana, you've got a whole life ahead of you. You're so so young. You have so much time to heal from shit that traumatized you. If you don't heal what hurt you, you'll bleed on people who didn't cut you. You understand that?"
And that did it.
The tears started to pour from her eyes.
She tried to keep a straight face but it was no use.
"C'mere," I mumbled, sitting down on Billie's bed next to her and pulling her in my arms.
"I've gotchu, you're alright. Everything's okay, I'm right here." I whispered, letting her cry on my chest as I lightly caressed her red hair.
She let out shaky, soft sobs and whimpers as her body shook each time she breathed in.
I only held her tighter each time she shook.
As long as she's in my arms, she's okay.
"I left for two reasons, Ariana. My manager found out what I got myself tangled into and took my phone and basically controlled me. Made me move away, made sure I didn't get in contact with you ever again. You were a minor and still are. They found it sus that I was even hanging around you let alone the fact that you had a crush on me. But know this. I'm NEVER letting you go again. Never.
I also left because of Billie. I knew she left you. So I went after her. She was so drugged up she barely even remembered me. But I wanted to help her. I was determined to. And look where she is now. She's clean. No drugs or alcohol ever since she was with you. I'm gonna protect you with my fucking life, Ariana. Believe that.
And ya mama does too. You just gotta give her a chance. She's one of the most caring people I've ever met. Believe it or not, you're a lot like her. You ever listen to her music?" I asked, rubbing her back to comfort her.
"Just two songs." Her high pitched voice mumbled softly.
"Which one's?"
"Copycat and one that my friend played. I forgot what it was called."
"Have you ever heard any of her other songs?" I asked. She shook her head no.
"Hm... give them a listen some time. I think it'll help you understand her more."
She sniffled and nodded her head.
I kissed the top of her head and continued to try and comfort her.
Eventually, she fell asleep in my arms as her breathing had finally calmed down.
"I'm sorry, Ariana." I whispered, laying her down on Bil's bed and putting the covers over her.
I placed a soft kiss to her cheek and quietly left the room.
"Hey," Billie mumbled from the end of the hall.
I sighed and walked over to her.
"How'd it go?"
"Aight. She didn't exactly say she forgave me but she hugged me so..." I shrugged nonchalantly.
"But I'm not worried about me. I'm worried about you. I see she hasn't forgiven you yet."
"I'm trying, Jah. I really am. I don't wanna scare her. I want her to feel safe around me. I just, I feel like that's never gonna happen. Maybe we should just give up now..." She mumbled.
"No. We're not giving up. We worked to damn hard to find her just for you. I don't care how long it takes. You're gonna have to adjust some strings."
"What do you mean?"
"... Where does her mom live?"
A/N : I am the king of cliff hangers, no cap 🤪
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