Let Yourself Fall // sequel to My Ethan Karpathy

Chapter 106.

PAISLEYS POV:

Ethan.

He was standing on my doorstep.

I am unable to move, my jaw drops and I stand there awkwardly. He's looking at me with these eyes that make me want to tear my hair out. Why did I leave this? We both stare at each other for a few seconds, then we both take a step forward. He's grown a bit in the past we weeks, he's taller.

"Ethan." I say, barely above a whisper at the same time he says "Paisley.".

He then smiles at me, and I take this as a cue to go for it. I smile one of the happiest smiles I've ever smiled as I run the last few steps to him. I jump and wrap my legs around him as well as my arms, holding on like never before. He holds me close to him and let's me bury my face into the crook of his neck. I smile even harder as I take in his intoxicating scent.

"Please don't cry." he says quietly into my hair with a hint of amusement in his voice.

"I didn't realise." I reply, only now feeling the wetness running down my cheeks.

"Shit, I'm getting make up on your shirt." I laugh, dropping back down onto my feet but keeping myself in his arms, and him in mine.

"Doesn't matter. Are you okay?" Ethan asks, his arms hanging around my waist.

"I don't want to let you go." I say, smiling at his chest.

"Please don't." he whispers, moving one hand to my cheek.

He cups my cheek with his right hand and uses his thumb to rub small circles into my skin. He brushes his thumb over my bottom lip ever so lightly, but I get butterflies all the same. I've waited weeks to kiss him again.He slowly brings his head down, and it's driving me crazy. I can tell he's hesitating. I can't take it any longer, so I stand on my tippy toes and kiss him. We both smile into the kiss as we hear a voice behind us.

"You owe me five bucks."

It was Jai. We both pull away, smile at each other and then I turn and face the boys that Ethan is smirking at. Chris is reluctantly handing Jai a five dollar note and rolling his eyes.

"Did you guys bet on us?" Ethan laughs.

"Maybe.." Jai says, a crazy smirk on his face.

I go quiet when I remember what I have to to tell Ethan. I want to do it now, there's no other choice.

"What's wrong?" Ethan asks, noticing my mood change. I get this sick, sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. There's a big, dry lump in my throat and this is starting to eat me from the inside out.

"I need to tell you something." I say, grabbing his hand and leading him through the house. I take him up the stairs and down the hallway.

"This is a really nice house" he compliments, looking up at the roof as we walk.

"In here." I hesitate, pulling him into my room.

"Paisley, what's happening?" He asks as I close the door. I walk over to the bed and wait for him to sit next to me. He's looking at me with big, curious, and almost scared eyes.

"Ethan.. Before we can do 'us' again, I need to tell you something. It could ruin everything, but I want you to know that it meant nothing. I love you, I will always love you. I want you, only you." I start. He just nods and tells me to continue, listening hard.

"Paisley." he says suddenly, just as I'm about to continue.

"Can I ask you a question first?" He asks.

"Yeah, of course." I say just as he grabs my hands.

"Where did you go? When you left..?" He asks, staring down at our fingers.

"I- I went to someone's house." I stutter, hoping he doesn't want to know more. He does.

"Who's?" He presses on.

"I.." I trail off.

"Paisley, please, I don't mind." he says in the nicest voice I've heard in a while.

"I.. I went to Brai's." I say as loudly as I dare. He sort of goes silent for a few seconds, pulling his hands away from mine. We both move so we're facing the same way, our backs facing towards the wall. We are both awkwardly fiddling with our own hands in our laps.

"You cheated with him, didn't you?" He whispers, and I have to take a few seconds to make sure I heard him right.

"Ethan, I'm sorry.. It, it meant nothing. I was drunk.. I.." I stutter and trail off.

"He got you drunk?" He asks, his voice still soothing, but sounding hurt.

"Yes- well, no.. But.." I hesitate.

"Yes or no?" He asks.

"Yes.. But it wasn't just him."

It's not all a lie. There was definitely something in the drinks, it wasn't cordial. It all goes silent, and I know whatever happens next will determine everything.

"I understand that I've messed up, but I want to be with you. I'm done running, I've found you again, and it's only now that it feels like it's going to be okay. I cheated, I know, I don't want Brai though, I want you, Ethan. I understand if you want to break-" I start, but he cuts me off.

"It doesn't matter. I just got you back, there's no way I'm letting you go again." he says, the first bit through a big sigh.

"You're okay with it?" I ask, not really believing.

"I can.. Handle it. I respect you so much more for telling me." he tells me, looking at me, but I continue to stare at my hands.

"I love you." I whisper, meeting his gaze. He has a tiny hint of a smile on his face.

"I love you too, now come here." he says, opening his arms for me.

I jump straight to him and wrap my arms around his neck tightly, knocking him over backwards onto the bed. He rolls us over so I'm on the bottom then kisses both my cheeks. He then kisses my lips softly, pulling away to look at me. Without breaking eye contact, he rolls over again so that we are laying next to each other. We continue to talk about things for ages, not changing our position. We hear footsteps coming up the stairs, and I'm assuming it's Jai and Chris, or even Anna and Khloe. Ethan checks the time.

"Eight o'clock." he whispers.

"Pretend to be asleep." I whisper just before the footsteps stop. We both lay still, my face buried into his chest.

"I think they're asleep." I hear someone female whisper. It must be Khloe and Anna.

"We'll come by tomorrow and get him, alright?" I hear a male voice whisper. Maybe they're all here.

"Let them have tomorrow to themselves. They look so cute." someone else whispers.

"Goodnight, guys." I think Khloe whispers before the light is turned out and the door is closed. We don't really talk after that, I think we are both tired. It doesn't take long before I fall into a deep, relaxing sleep.

A/N: oh, so their back together.. Yay?

Yes.. So.. Um..

This book is ending soon, but I will be starting another book almost straight away. I'm not sure if it will be a Jai, Ethan or even just a random love story yet. I have the whole plan, so let me know what you think in the comments.

Also, R.I.P to my baby rabbit, Scotchy who passed away this morning.

Peace, love and Ethan Karpathy.