Let Yourself Fall // sequel to My Ethan Karpathy

Chapter 13.

PAISLEYS POV:

I know where I'm going, I know what I need to do. I can feel Ethan's eyes on me as I walk. I know he's watching. I still taste his lips and I still feel his heartbeat. This is what I want to remember of my life. This is how I want to go. I walk to the little creek where I find the little bridge. The creek is dangerous here, but this time it's to my advantage. I will fall on rocks, it will be over quickly. I climb up to the top of the bridge and just look out for a moment. I take a deep breath, wipe my tears on Ethan's hoodie sleeve, then climb over the low handrail. I look out down the creek, let down my hair and close my eyes. I let my hair blow in the breeze for a few final seconds.

"Goodbye, Ethan. I love you." I whisper, even though no one can hear me.

I feel a crying fit coming on, so I step forward. One more step and I'll be off. I slowly move my right foot forward, over the edge of the bridge. I feel nothing but air below me. I am falling for less than a millisecond when I feel a pair of strong arms pull me back against them. I collapse to the ground, a river of tears cascading down my cheeks. The boy is wearing a soft, grey hoodie. I can smell him, he smells so good, so familiar.. They smell like Jai..

I try to wriggle out of the persons arms so can just jump and get it over and done with, but they just hold me tighter. They're holding me in a way that doesn't hurt, and I don't know what do do besides cry. I look up and see that it is actually Jai, and I wish I wasn't like this right now. I finally give up my struggle and become limp in his arms. He just holds me to him and after a while, I turn around and wrap my arms around him.

"Paisley," I hear him whisper as I feel a wet drop land on my neck.

"Don't cry for me." I whisper back into the softness of his hoodie.

"Why?" is all he can reply. I don't understand why we're whispering.

I can't reply, I can only cry harder. We stay there for a long time, Jai just holding me. Holding me together, holding onto my life on to this world.

"I'm taking you to Ethan." he whispers into my hair.

Then my eyes snap open as I realise. I left Ethan alone.