Let Yourself Fall // sequel to My Ethan Karpathy

Chapter 91.

PAISLEYS POV:

What am I doing? Why am I letting Brai even get this close to me? I have a boyfriend. I'm so messed up. I can tell its early morning, so I slide out of the blankets. I quickly grab a change of clothes and head to the bathroom to get changed. Once I do, I drop the old clothes just inside Brai's room and walk downstairs. I hear someone moving in the kitchen and I assume it's Sarah. She said she was leaving early.

"Oh, hi, Paisley, Is everything okay?" She asks, turning and leaning against the bench to look at me.

"Yeah, I couldn't sleep. I just want to say thank you." I say, thinking that this is the best time to get on her good side.

"It's no problem. Do you want to talk about anything? I only have a few minutes." she asks, checking her watch.

"Not really thank you, but do you want anything done while you're out?"

"That's really sweet, but no thank you. Just make sure Brai's up by eleven and let him know he has to call his dad. See you later, sweetie. Please make yourself at home." she smiles, walking out the kitchen.

"I will. Have a good day." I say, earning a smile.

I sit on a bar stool for a while. It's only when I hear the door click that I know she's gone. I slide off and walk over to the cupboard, seeing if there's anything I can make Brai for breakfast. I spot a shake pancake mix on the top shelf and stand on my tiptoes to get it. I fill the bottle with water up to the line and shake it up. Then I turn on the stove and heat up a pan before continuing to cook a stack. I don't know why, but I've always had a thing for cooking pancakes. I'm just good it. I check the time and see its 9:00. I don't know whether to wake Brai up. Sarah said 11. My thoughts are interrupted when I feel someone poking my sides from behind. I almost jump out of my skin.

"Woah, sorry. I didn't mean to scare you." the person says. I realise it was Brai.

"Don't do that. Here's your breakfast." I say, handing him a plate, still recovering from the initial shock.

"Oh my god, thank you." he says, grabbing the plate from me.

He takes it over to the table and sets his plate down. He pulls out a chair for me and I sit down. Am I leading him on? I'm not meaning to. We eat our pancakes in silence. I don't know why, but I feel so at home here. I'm not sure what to say or do, but I feel like I'm in the way of something. These things don't usually mix together. I don't know how I can feel so at home but so annoying at the same time. When we finish, I take Brai's plate to the sink. I want to do as much as possible around here, helping out in every way I can. Brai tries to stop me, but I do the dishes, dry and put them away.

"You didn't have to do that. What do you want to do today?" He asks.

"Yes I did. And I don't know, what is there to do?" I shrug.

"Um, we could go to the beach, or we could just watch movies. I don't know." he replies.

"What do you want to do?"

"Why don't we have a lazy day. We can have a track pants and singlet movie afternoon." he suggests.

"Sounds good."

We walk back upstairs and into Brai's room. I dig through my suitcase and find my grey trackies and a white tank top. I turn around and am mentally smacked in the face. Brai's got his back to me, but he's already got his shirt on the floor. You'd think he'd wait? I turn back around, incredibly embarrassed. I pretend to be shuffling through my clothes until I think it's safe to turn around again. When I do, Brai's sitting on the bed, playing with his socks. I stand up and leave the room, heading for the bathroom, quickly getting changed, paranoid he's going to walk in. I walk back into his room and put my old clothes back in my suitcase. I continue to clean up after myself, folding up all my clothes I dropped on the floor in the rush to find my tank top.

"Ugh, stop. Don't bother." Brai groans.

"Just wait." I brush him off. I turn around and start to make my bed. I tuck the corners under the mattress and straighten the crinkles.

"Paisley, come on. Stop, or I'll have to do it myself." he whines.

"Just a second."

"No, now." he says, getting up.

I feel myself being lifted up and thrown over his shoulder. I struggle at first, but the fear of accidentally elbowing him in the face wins out. He walks me down the hall and down the stairs, throws me down on the couch and sits by me, picking up the remote and flicking on the TV. He presses a few buttons and a list of movies comes up. He scrolls right down to the bottom, letting me see what he has. We decide on '50 first dates' for some reason. As the movie starts, I sit up, letting him get comfy. He puts his feet up on the couch and sort of hugs his knees towards his chest. I sort of do the same, but facing the other way. I was sort of squished because I didn't want our feet to be awkwardly touching.

As the movie went on however, that completely changed. At one point Brai's legs were resting over my lap. At another point, he was laying upside down with his legs up the back of the couch. I have to admit, my hips really starting to hurt. I need to turn over. Brai's currently sitting normally with his head propped up on his arm. I twist my body around so I'm laying on my back and swing my legs over the arm of the couch. I slide myself forward so my heads on the couch, not Brai. I'm now taking up three quarters of the couch. Brai shifts so my head is in his lap. We move in tiny, awkward moves until I'm laying right against him. A few more moves later, and I'm laying right on top of him. He's laying on his back while I'm laying my head on his chest. I feel so bad right now. It's not like I'm kissing him, right? And Ethan never has to know.

ETHANS POV:

The boys and I are laying on the couch playing GTA when I hear the doorbell. I pause and get up to answer it. Cat was standing there awkwardly.

"Hey," she hesitates.

"Hey, is everything okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, I just have nothing to do." she shrugs.

"Come in." I say, opening the door wide for her.

She walks through and sees the other guys, sitting down on the end arm of the couch. I walk back in and then my phone rings, I check to see there was no caller ID. I answer it, walking out the room. I hear whispers behind me.

JAIS POV:

"Guys, she's gone to Brai's house." Cat says quietly.

"Wait, Paisley?" I ask, realising how bad this is. Brai's going to try something.

"Yeah. He saw her at the airport, she's staying at his house."

"That's not good. Does Ethan know?" Chris asks.

"No, and don't tell him."

"Okay," Chris says as Ethan walks back in.

"Wrong number." he shrugs.

We continue to play our game while Cat watches with a confused expression on her face. I've been thinking, though. There's no point in me staying here if Paisley isn't. I should go home, spend my break with the rest of my family. If I can't stay here, the hotel room is really boring. Dean and I can't even go surfing here. I think I'll talk to mum about it. I'm 16, I need to to 16 year old things. I need to get my learners, I need to go to parties, I need to have fun. I do some of that, but not enough. I don't even think half my friends would recognise me now. I'm away that often. I don't know. If Paisley really is with Brai, I know something is going to happen. She needs to have a break, not spend a few weeks with Brai. That's just going to make her even more confused.