Let Yourself Fall // sequel to My Ethan Karpathy

Chapter 110.

ETHANS POV:

We are about to leave for dinner. We let the girls get ready first, so now it's our turn. I'm in Paisley's room. I put down my bag of clothes, and something catches my eye. The box has been moved from the bed to the bedside cupboard, but there's something on top of it. I'm scared it will fall off and get damaged, so I walk over and am about to put it back in the box when I realise something. This is a new note, it wasn't in there before. I pick it up and start to read.

'Dear Ethan,

I know I've been away from you the last couple of weeks, but now I'm back and I'm ready to be with you forever. You have changed me from a shy, nerdy girl to the girl I always wanted to be- the girl I was too afraid to be.

I don't know how anything I could write would ever match up to what you've written for me, but I'm hoping it's enough. I am head over heels in love with you. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world, because the first person I dated, was my true love. It was you.

I don't know what else to say, but I do want you to know that I am prepared for a long, happy life with you. I am ready for a life of hugs, kisses and love from you to keep me going. I can't wait to walk down the aisle and in front of you, knowing you are so proud of me. You must know that I love everything about you, and I am proud of the man you are becoming. I know it sounds so cheesy and like something your mother would say, but your mother isn't here. Neither is mine, but somehow, it doesn't seem to matter.

I promised your mum that I would stay by you, to not let anything hurt you. I haven't always done that, I've slipped up, but I can fix it. I am going to love you until the day we both die, I promise you that.

Love, Paisley xoxo'

I believe there's a risk you need to take when you fall in love. You either fall into hell, or you fall into the best thing that's ever happened to you. The problem is, you don't know what's going to happen. You just have to blindly take the leap of faith and hope for the best. It seems easy to just forget about and it and let it pass you by, but if you let your true love go, you might never get them back again. You need to fight, you need to fight for not only them, but for yourself. They steal a part of you, and you need to make sure they keep it safe.

This girl.. This girl is my safety net. I've fallen for her since day one. That first day.. I remember Paisley coming down the stairs, looking like an angel floating from the heavens. I remember that feeling I got from her first touch. I remember when we sang together.. It made me feel perfect. It made me feel alive again, like I was actually a part of this world. I remember our first sex, I remember our first kiss by that tree. I remember every little detail of it. All of those hard times we went though in those years, they helped shape us into the people we are now. I wouldn't trade anything that's happened for anything in the world.

We both came from families with divorced parents, we didn't know what love really was. Somehow, we found it. We found it in the best and the darkest of times, we have found it always, we will find it forever. We are in love, I fell, she fell, we caught each other. We went through a lot, and now we are ready to start a new life.

My dream when I was seven, was to be an astronaut. I was always fascinated by flying into other worlds, exploring new places. I always wanted to be able to be free, have no boundaries. I didn't know what life was really like, and I didn't care. I just knew I craved that feeling of flying. I did end up getting it, but not in the way I ever expected it. I got it when I touched Paisley, when I knew I loved her.

I don't know how someone can be beautiful but sexy, shy but so sure of themselves, quiet but loud, sad but happy.. But somehow, she is. It will never make sense to me, but that doesn't matter. She is mine, I am hers.. Forever..

As lots of people say; 'forever is a long time, but I wouldn't mind spending it by your side'.

I was just a boy, standing in front a girl, asking her to love him. The beautiful thing was that she did.. There's a movie I once watched, and I remember a quote; 'the best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that's what you've given me, that's what I hope to give to you forever', and I've never heard anything more true.

The greatest thing you'll ever get the chance to do, is find love. So when it comes, you can't let it pass you by. You need to earn it, fight for it, do whatever it takes. I have gone to measures I never thought I would need to go to for her, and I honestly don't regret it one single bit.

Even when I die, I know I'll still love her. It's like a piece of me was missing, then she came along. I remember how shy she used to be, I remember how she used to be so innocent. I'm so proud of what she's become, and I'm so proud of what she continues to do every day. She continues to impress me each and every second, and I'm never going to get tired of her. She's perfect, I can't even begin to describe her. She is everything I will ever want.

Im not falling for her anymore, I have fallen for her. And she's caught me. That's what this experience has taught me; If you want to fly, you've got to let yourself fall.