Let Yourself Fall // sequel to My Ethan Karpathy

Chapter 94.

BRAIS POV:

It feels nice to be held by her. It's actually comforting to know someone cares and doesn't judge me. I've never talked to anyone about it like this, and I'm not sure if it feels good or bad. We're still laying against the wall, I'm leaning against her. I feel so embarrassed for crying like that in front of her, but I do feel a little better. I remember Friday night, but I'm going to wait for the right time to ask. If she says no, I don't know what I'll do. I feel like I've been threatened. If I don't go, my friends will probably ditch me. I hate peer pressure.

"Paisley?" I ask flatly.

"Mhmm?"

"On Friday night, there's this school dance thing. I was was wondering if you could maybe go with me.. As friends." I ask, trying to get it out of the way.

"What is it?" She asks.

"It's a dance thing the school does in the middle of the holidays as a catch up thing." I explain.

"I've never been to a school dance."

"Well, you have the chance to now. The guys want me to go, and I don't want to bring any other girl."

"As friends?" She asks.

"Yeah." I reply, as much as it hurts.

"Okay."

"So you'll go with me?" I ask, my heart racing.

"Yeah."

So I'm going, and I'm going with Paisley. I think of something, though. I don't want to be thrown at by girls. Maybe they'll back off if they thought Paisley was my girlfriend. I also don't want other guys hitting on Paisley, partly for my sake, but mainly for Ethan's.

"Thank you."

"What am I supposed to wear to a high school dance?" She asks.

"Um.. Like, it's a year ten party type thing. It's not a primary school disco." I shrug.

"That doesn't help." she laughs.

"Ugh, I don't know. Last year the popular girls came in as little as possible. Tight, upper to mid thigh dresses. The normal girls wore the same type of thing, but more appropriate. The boring people either didn't come, or wore jeans and a shirt. Take your pick." I tell her.

"I can work from that."

I'm not going to mention how last years dance got incredibly out of hand, and the teachers kicked everyone out. There were drunk people wandering the streets. Drunk fourteen and fifteen year olds are not good. Now most of us are sixteen, but Paisley's not sixteen yet. She's sixteen in two weeks.. I should plan something. If you think about it, Paisley has had a lot happen to her. She's been pregnant, gotten drunk, almost got raped, tried to commit suicide, self harm. The list goes on, and she's not even sixteen yet. I just feel so good about myself when I'm around her. It's like I know someone who's been through what I have, and is still alive to tell me about it. I know that's a horrible way to put it, but in a way, it's true. I don't know anymore. I know I need to back off, I know I've overstepped big time. I know she shouldn't be here, but no one even knows besides Cat anyway, and she won't tell anyone.

ETHANS POV:

I miss her, but the feeling of knowing that it's going to be better when she comes back, is winning. I know it's going to work out now. It doesn't matter what happens between then and now, because I know inside me that she's coming back. I wonder where she's gone to be honest. I think Holly knows, because she never went to the police. Maybe she's staying with someone then? I wonder how Brai is going? I hope he's not angry or upset anymore, I want to leave that behind us. He knows to back off, but he's not going to see her again if I have anything to do with it. He can find another girl, his own, and leave mine alone.

A/N: so sorry it's short. Busy with school stuff.

Peace, love and Ethan Karpathy.