''Camila, you know it's been a long time coming.''
''We can't keep doing this, Shawn.'' I sob, aware that my heart is breaking as well as his. ''I really didn't want to lose you, but I don't want to keep playing these games with you. I'm tired of bu...
I lean my head against the van glass wanting to get some sleep before I get to the set. I haven't gotten a good night's sleep in a long time and jet lag is taking its chaotic toll on my nervous system. I'm hoping that staying hydrated will help me subsist during the day and tonight I can get some rest. There are a lot of events coming up and I need to be one hundred percent focused.
- Are you doing well? - Andrew asks sitting next to me when he sees me stirring uncomfortably.
- Yes. - I mumble sleepily.
- Are you really? - He squints at me through his glasses.
- No. - I admit with a laugh. - You know me so well.
- That's why I'm your manager. - He pats my shoulder jocularly. - Try to sleep, kid. We still have an hour to go.
I nod, folding my arms and closing my eyes in a poor attempt to rest. If it wasn't for this commitment we have with Hailey I wouldn't have left the hotel. I had fun playing In My Blood live for the first time yesterday on James' show but my energy is at rock bottom. I don't know how to show my best side on set today and compete against Odell for TBS's 'Drop The Mic' show, where Hailey is hosting.
To update in a nutshell, we managed to finish the album a week after returning from retirement in Jamaica. The track list selection was very tricky for me, and I had to discard a lot of songs (much to Scott's chagrin); but still the album came out longer than usual. It's not too bad, but we're considering releasing the Deluxe version if we can fix the ones I originally discarded, including the rough drafts of Everything Means Nothing and Song For No One. We really wanted to put the last one on, but I felt there was enough sadness from Perfectly Wrong, and the last thing I want is for the album to be depressing. Maybe I'll include it for the next one as soon as I start working on it.
I feel so attached to the process in every aspect that's why we decided at the last minute to name the album after myself, because it totally reflects me and all the effort I put into the songwriting and production with the guys.
Andrew, and especially Sylvie, are pushing the promotion of the first singles on social media thanks to their idea to release 'Shawn Access' at the beginning of the month, and we are waiting to confirm if there will be new singles and the release date of the In My Blood music video next month. There's no time to waste, and while this is happening I must make sure I stay in public so they know I haven't disappeared, and that's one of the reasons I'll be on the show today.
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The van we're in pulls into the TBS studios and parks in the reserved parking lot. I hide behind my sunglasses so my dark circles under my eyes don't show and I'm not fully awake when my door slams open, revealing Hailey all smiles and ready to hug me.
