Survival Bonds

Chapter 66: A king for a pawn

It hurts to breathe. Breathing almost feels suffocating. Like it would hurt less if I just stopped. If I just stopped fighting for a moment the pain would stop.

So why do I not want the pain to stop.

I feel both freezing and hot at the same time. I'm scared, but I'm calm. I don't know if I'm alive or not. Why am I not scared. Why am I so sure that everything will be okay.

"How the fuck did he escape!" That vengeful voice could cut through even the deepest of sleep. Looks like my husband is angry. Not at me I hope. I'm so tired. I should open my eyes and tell Severus that I'm alright. But this half sleep feels so peaceful.

"Sevy." And that's Wendy's voice. "Har Har is sleeping. Inside voice." She says chastising him lightly.

"Perhaps we should talk in the other room." I think that's Poppy, but I'm not really sure. I feel a larger hand squeeze over mine.

"I'm not leaving his side." His voice is threatening.

"The aurors are looking everywhere for him Severus. They will find him. Harry is stable. You are both safe, now you need to rest." Definitely Poppy.

"I will not rest until that man is dead. Not captured. Not awaiting a worse sentence. Dead!" I really don't want to wake up. The pain is agonizing. How am I even alive.

"Bad Sevy! You woke Har Har." Wendy sounds accusing. I feel much weaker when I open my eyes. I'm dressed in night clothes.

"Don't move to much. How are you feeling? Are you hurting anywhere?"

"Severus, give him a chance to answer." Poppy pats his arm. "You gave us all a scare Harry."

"How am I alive? He used the killing curse. How am I alive."

"I saved you." Severus says slowly. "Well. My wand saved you. It acted on it's own accord. For once I'm actually not upset with it."

"You both instinctively protected each other." Poppy explains. "You shielded him and his wand protected you. Unfortunately, you weren't the only one hit. I knew that Albus Dumbledore was... flawed, but I certainly didn't expect him to do this. He killed four wizards three were aurors, and he escaped. No one knows where he could be."

"Why didn't the aurors take his wand from him. That should have been the first thing taken." It's painful, but I force myself to sit up. Silently, Severus helps me.

"Harry, they did take his wand." Poppy says slowly. "He was casting the killing curse wandlessly." She gives me a tight forced smile. "Severus did not trust St Mungo's, or the medical wing at Hogwarts. Understandably so, we apparated you to the safe house and you've been in a healing coma for three days. Considering the potential that you could have died, three days of rest isn't too high a price to pay."

"We have to find him before he can do more harm." I say. He was aiming for Severus. Why Severus. Why wasn't he aiming to kill me. It doesn't make sense.

"You aren't going anywhere." Severus says in his familiar way. He's acting different. He's acting how he use to when he was my teacher and not my husband.

"Severus, I have to do something."

"You aren't going anywhere Harry. You are still hurt. The aurors will find him, and you will stay here to rest."

"You both will." Poppy says. "Harry. The thickheaded snake will only listen to you. He hasn't slept since you were attacked. It's been three days. Please work that power you have over him to get him to settle down." The shadows under his eyes do look darker. His hair hasn't been washed either. He probably hasn't left my side all this time. Sleep does sound good. I'm still so tired.

"We still have to stop him, but we are useless if we are falling asleep. Severus, please don't fight me on this. She's right. We both need rest." I grab his arm and try to encourage him to slide into the bed, but it's like I have no strength in my body. Grabbing him is the most I can do right now. When he doesn't move, I smile as cheeringly as I can. "Severus, humor me. I'd feel much better if my husband is next to me. It's Doctors orders that I need to rest more, and I'm not going to unless you agree to sleep as well." He exhales agitatedly. He's not upset with me or even Poppy. Just the situation.

It feels nice wrapping my arms around him.

"Good night Sevy. Good night Har Har. Wen Wen will protect." She pats the top of my head and then the top of Severus's. Softly I hear them both leave the room.

Wrapped around my husband, I feel surprisingly safe.

"Don't ever do something like that again." His voice breaks through the quiet.

"If I didn't, you would have died."

"Harry. This world doesn't need me, but it does need you. Your life is far more important than mine. You do not sacrifice a king for a pawn."

"Severus." I think this is the first time I'm the small one being comforted. It feels good to lay on his chest. It feels good to be held. "Without my queen, I have no desire to be king."

"Harry. If the king dies, then so does the queen. If you die in the process of saving me, then you have accomplished nothing because I won't live long after."

"And you think I would? Severus, I don't want to bicker right now. Lets just agree that neither of us will die? You protect me with your life and I'll protect you with mine. We will live together or die together."

"Harry."

"I'm sorry for worrying you Severus, but I couldn't take the chance of losing you. I wasn't thinking clearly. It's like Poppy said. I was moving on instincts. But if I did have time to think, I would have still done the same thing. And I'll do it again. And again. Forever. You messed up Sevy, you made me fall in love with you. No backsies." His wonderful warm laugh melts me.

"Sappy fool."

"What can I say, you bring out the worst in me."

"And you bring out the worst in me."

"You are so lucky I have no energy or I'd have to bugger you senseless." He scoffs.

"For now, you'll have to settle for a kiss." I feel his lips press to the top of my head and I have to say I'm pleased with myself. My body feels like lead, and the pain hasn't let up. But we are both alive. We are both safe.

Dumbledore is still out there. Who knows when he will strike again. Who knows what his next plan is. If he can wandlessly cast an unforgiveable, then he's a much bigger danger than I thought. Next time I may not be able to save Severus in time. Next time I may actually die. I could try to stop Dumbledore on my own, but last time I acted on my own Severus got hurt saving me. We are up against someone much more dangerous than Voldemort. I can't recklessly charge in.

Beside me Severus is lightly snoring. If I move at all he only grips me tighter- not that I mind. I can't act alone. I can't do that to Severus, but I really don't want to put him in more danger. For now, we do both need rest. I have a lot of questions, but right now I just don't have the energy.

You failed Dumbledore. You tried to take my husband from me, but you didn't. You outed yourself as the evil you are now all of the magical world knows not to trust you. We will find you and then this blasted war can finally end.