Survival Bonds

Chapter 76: Consummation

Knees are bend on either side of my head. My nose is buried in the mound of pubic hair as I greedily suck him. His hand is desperately trying to push my mouth away, but I keep hungrily sucking.

"Har... Harry no more. That's enough. No more!" Even as he's arching his back and his hips are trembling, his hand is pushing against my forehead. But I can't stop. I've never tasted anything as intoxicating as the drops of precum on my tongue. "Harry. I can't. It's dirty. A cleaning charm isn't enough. I should... I need to take a bath first." No. I don't want anything masking this taste.

"Severus, you are so delicious it's turning me on." Trying to calm him, I lay a flat hand on his abdomen and with my other hand I grasp his erection. My thumb is on the underside pressing against the tip. A lewd looking vein tempts me so I suck on it lovingly. It feels so good to just trace it with my tongue.

"Harry! You have to stop. I can't. If you keep doing that then I won't be able to last. You have stop."

"Then cum. Stop holding back. If you need to cum then just go ahead. Severus, don't make me stop." He's biting his bottom lip in a futile attempt to restrain his lovely voice. He will never have another experience like our first time.

He was so afraid. He was trying so hard to not be 'present'.

"Harry, just... let me prepare myself first. I have to before you..."

"I'll do it in a bit Severus. Let me enjoy you first."

"Harry. Please. I'll do it. No more. I'll do it." His body is trembling. "I'll do it. It's dirty. I don't want you touching... dirty. I can't anymore Harry." His entire body is flushed a pretty pink.

"Does this not feel good?" He's biting his bottom lip. "Do you not like this?"

"Dirty." Is his weak reply.

"Severus. I want to do this. I want to make you feel good. You aren't dirty. I want to be the one to make you come undone. I want to taste you, and prepare you, and get you off. If you don't like this then I'll stop. I don't want to do anything you don't like. I'm not going to decide for you if something feels good or not, but don't decide for me either. Severus being able to touch you like this is really turning me on. I think I could cum just by sucking you." I smile at him gently. I know his traumas will never be erased completely. He will likely always be nervous with intimacy, but he's not going to find any doubt or reason to be self conscious with me. "Do you not like this?" I ask again. My thumb presses against the head of his dick and droplets of precum leak out.

Dark eyes close tightly. Pale cheeks turn a pretty rosy shade. "It feels good. Really good."

"Then relax and let yourself feel good." His eyes are covered by his elbow. I don't comment on the tears he's trying to hide.

"Harry. I'm self-conscious. I'm not like you. You're young and attractive. I'm malnourished, scarred and ugly. I don't feel comfortable being shown this much attention."

I want more of him. I want to kiss every inch of him.

"Severus, look at me." He shakes his head keeping his face hidden. "Severus." I say gentler. When he still is unresponsive I dot light kisses up his abdomen until I get to his chest. My thumb presses against one of the hard nubs and when he shivers, I smile against his skin. "I love you so much. I want to discover all the places that you feel good." As I stroke him fully, his back arches into my touch. I want to lavish his body is so much love he could drown. I want to touch him so deeply he could never forget the feel of my fingertips. When I capture one of his erect nipples between my teeth, he reluctantly lets out a keening moan. "You are so beautiful." The kind words only seem to excite his starved body more.