Beautiful Ruin

Chapter 12.

Jordan

"Keep fucking with me Mani."

We were in Pizza Hut and Mani kept taking the sausages off my pizza when I was not looking.

"I love sausages."

"So why you ain get none on yo pizza then."

"Cause I had to pay extra I ain got money to waste on shit."

"So now that you're in a good mood, you gonna tell me bout that scar on ya body."

She tensed up and looked out the window. I just want to know everything that happened when I left. It's just this feeling I get when I'm with her that she is hiding something from me. She won't fully relax or feel free unless she let's it out. No more will I let her carry her burdens alone, not while I'm around.

I took her hand and rubbed it gently with my thumb letting her know that it was okay. She took a deep breath and looked at me.

"Let's go for a walk, I don't want to talk in here."

"Okay."

We got up and disposed of our containers and walked outside into the crisp September air. There was a playground nearby so we walked over and sat on the swings. After a couple moments she broke the silence.

Emani

"It all continued going bad right after Tyson raped me, everything went downhill real fast. I found out I was pregnant during Finals."

I paused to look at Jordan's response but he just looked at me with comforting eyes so I continued my story.

"My parents of course were super mad at me and they threw me out no questions asked. So I went to my grandma's and not for one second did she judge me or looked at me like I was disappointment. She told me that I wasn't having an abortion and that she would help me raise the baby. When I told her that Tyson raped me she tried calling his parents to let them know that I was pregnant but they already left for the summer. So we started making a plan for the baby and after awhile I got excited you know. Even though it's not how I imagined it to happen it was happening and I accepted it. I went to summer school to take extra classes so that by time the baby was born I wasn't going to be left behind. By time school started all kinds of rumors were flying around school how I was hoe, people saying I fucked the whole basketball team so I don't know who the daddy is."

Before I knew it he was wiping my tears, not realizing I started crying myself.

"Of course I told Tyson but he just denied it. After his parents found out, they told him to take responsibility for what he had done but he didn't want to. One night in October I stayed at the library late to finish my home-work so I had to wait a half hour for the bus to arrive. While I was waiting I heard someone come up behind me but by the time I turned around I got stabbed. He left me there on the bus stop to bleed out. Just when I thought it was all over, the bus pulled up and the driver spotted me laying behind the bench. He took me to the hospital but it was too late, I had lost my baby."

I stared at my hands not being able to look him in the face feeling ashamed. Sensing my discomfort, he took my hand in his.

"Emani I'm not going to judge you based on something that was beyond your control. I'm sorry you had to go through that so young I mean damn. Do you even know who stabbed you?"

"It was Tyson. You're the only person that knows this Jordan. Never told my grandma or the police and I would like it to stay that way."

"Okay, come on let me walk you to your dorm."

We walked back to my dorm and he followed me inside the apartment. As I turned around to tell him good night He grabbed me and hugged me hard and long followed by a kiss on the forehead.

"Good night Mani."

"Good night Jordan."

I turned around and went into my room and got ready for bed feeling lighter than I have in years.

April

I heard Emani and Jordan come in and I was hoping to catch him before he leaves. Soon as I heard her door close, I rushed out to catch him.

"Jordan, can we talk."

"The last time I talked to you I got my face bashed in so I'll pass."

He turned to walk out the door.

"I think I'm pregnant," I blurted out as he was leaving.

He froze in his tracks and turned around slowly.

"My period was to come about 4 weeks ago."

"About a week ago, you was fucking all the homies though. So I know I ain the father that's for sure.You ain nothing but a trifling hoe."

He sang and did the Bobby Schmurda like this was a joke. That shit cut real deep. As I turned and headed for my room he left singing. I turned out the lights and went to bed crying. There is a possibility Jordan could be the father but who am I kidding. He was right I was a hoe, but I didn't deserve him throwing that in my face. I made up my mind to get a pregnancy test first thing in the morning at least then I can ease my mind and figure out what the hell to do.