How To Stay Afloat (BxB)

Chapter 51: Let's stay like this forever

At half past nine we make our way back home from the ice rink. Seems like Austin is staying over. I really can't argue with that.

"My ass is soaking wet. I'll probably get frostbite on my asscheeks." Caleb whines as we sit on the bus.

"It's got like five degrees outside, you'll be fine." Austin says. "Sammy went swimming in this temperature after all." He says, smiling as he looks at me.

"Yeah, if I hadn't been high I probably wouldn't have taken the cold so easily." I explain.

"Talking about high. You're still positive on the weed section." Caleb says.

"Oh, you are?" Carla chimes in.

I nod my head and shrug. "Yeah, I don't know how long it's gonna flag."

"But you didn't smoke anything since sunday, right?" Caleb asks me.

I roll my eyes. "How am I supposed to smoke if I'm controlled every second of my life?" I ask him. "No, I haven't smoked since friday."

Caleb wears a happy smile. "That's great to hear. It probably just takes a while to get out of your system." He suggests.

"It can take up to over a month." Austin says. "You smoked almost daily over a period of two months. I bet it will show up for at least another week." He explains.

Dad won't be happy about that.

_____

Back home my mom is happy to see us all again. She says it's a good idea for Austin to sleep over. I love that she's so accepting and supportive.

"Your dad comes home at 6 tomorrow. So I want you all to be as quiet as possible after that. He has a 25 hour shift and he hasn't gotten any real break until now." My mom tells us.

Oh man. That means he'll probably spend the whole weekend home.

"25 hours?" Carla asks, gasping. "That sounds horrible.

My mom gives her a smile. "That's part of the job."

Oh how glad I am that that won't be my future.

My mom wants to talk to me while the others all head upstairs.

"What is it?" I ask her as soon as it's just us two.

"Caleb told me about the video that's online." She says.

I bite my lip nervously. "Oh." Of course he did. Caleb has always been and will always be a backstabber when it comes to secrets from our parents.

"Honey, I know that this must be very hard for you. But you're working on yourself and getting better, that's all that counts. Whoever makes fun of you is just self conscious about their own life." She claims.

Yeah, right. I'm sure they all secretly have it all worse than I do.

"Okay, mom. It's okay." I say.

She looks like she doesn't believe me. "You can come talk to us. If people are making fun of you at school we can talk to your teachers." She suggests.

"Mom. No. The teachers don't care. That would only make it worse." I say.

"But you have your friends. Carla, Austin and Harry have your back, right?"

Harry. I wish we could finally settle things between us. It's been almost a week.

"Yeah. It's no big deal. Just some jocks that make fun of everyone." I assure her.

She embraces me in a hug and tells me how proud she is of me.

I don't feel like I deserve her compassion and praise. All I do is make wrong choices. I'm the one who's responsible for all the bad things that happen in my life.