It's Better to Burn Out than Fade Away-Kurt Cobain

Chapter 158

December 12, 1998

Tomorrow. 

I was getting married tomorrow to Ethan. 

I still couldn't believe it. 

I was sitting down on my bed while Lorelai painted my toenails. 

"Mom, can I ask you a question?" She asked. 

"You just did," I smirked at her. 

She rolled her eyes and continued to paint my nails. "Is it weird that you're getting married again when you didn't officially get a divorce?"

"No, you're meaning something else. Say what you really mean."

"Do you feel like you're betraying Kurt in any way by marrying someone else?"

"No, it's what he wanted for me."

"How do you know?"

"Because he left me a tape, too, and he told me that he wanted me to find someone better."

"Do you think that Ethan's better?"

No hesitation, I answered, "Yes."

"Where's your wedding dress at?"

"In the closet."

"Are you upset that you couldn't get a different one?"

"No, I really like that one."

I wasn't able to return the wedding dress that I bought for mine and Kurt's wedding. They wouldn't allow it. So, after all these years, I kept it in the closet with Kurt's belongings, but when Ethan proposed to me, I moved it into my closet. I loved that dress and I was happy I was actually able to use it. 

There was a knock at the door and I answered it to find Dave standing in front of me. As soon as he saw me, he hollered. 

"Would you shut your fucking mouth?!" I covered his mouth with my hand. "My daughter is literally sleeping."

"Jesus Christ, sorry," He backed away. "I came so that we can get fucked up tonight. I brought a lot of drinks."

"I can tell," I said, eyeing the beer in his hands. "Let's just wait until Lorelai goes down to sleep."

"And if you need any help for the wedding tomorrow, let me know and I'll help you."

"No, I'm fine."

"Ugh, fine, don't accept my help."

"At least I actually invited you to my wedding."

"Hey, that hit close to home," He jokingly said. 

His marriage didn't last long. He and Jennifer got a divorce in 1996, but it was finalized in 1997. It was all Dave's fucking fault and I was so angry at him for it. I cut him off for a while after I found out why they got a divorce and I stopped talking to him. We made up last year, but it still pissed me off. 

He cheated on Jennifer. He had an affair with a woman named Louise Post. She was a guitarist for the band Veruca Salt. She was a very pretty woman, though. She had short black hair and a good body. But that was no excuse for Dave's behavior. Louise and Dave only lasted a couple of months. She really wasn't fucking worth it.

There were other factors to the divorce, too, such as they weren't ready and were too young. But the affair was the main reason. Jennifer deserved better. I made sure to check up on her every once in a while to see if she was doing alright.