All The Little Lights

Chapter 42

{Trigger warning ⚠️ sexual assault}

Alexia

Empty.

That's all I am now.

Just like an empty shell, all that remains is an attractive outer shell which captures the eye of a crowd of fascinated onlookers.

Guzzling down another huge gulp of my beer, I swayed with the wind which took the role of a consoling friend running its fingers soothingly through strands of my hair.

I breathed heavily into my lungs which felt like it couldn't function under the thoughts that were crushing me down.

Darkness was the only thing I could see. It clouded all my senses.

I tried in another futile attempt to wipe away the tears that kept flowing down my cheeks.

I don't want to accept it, but I know.

I was scared. I am weak.

I tried to act like I was okay, that I was strong.

And I foolishly thought I could fight my past, my demons. That I was strong enough to do that alone.

But how wrong I was.

Chasing and being chased were really poles apart.

Taking another gulp of the beer, I closed my eyes.

~~~~~

I was getting ready to go out clubbing with my friends and sister determined to have a blast.

I was just about to exit my room, when my mom came in, startling me.

“Honey, where are you going?” Her voice was deceivingly sweet and calm making me on edge.

I didn't bother acknowledging her presence and was on my way to open the door behind her, when she spoke making me freeze

“He is coming”

“Who?” I didn't notice whether my voice wavered despite the sudden pit in my stomach, but the vicious smirk that formed on my mother's lips told me that it did.

I knew who the ‘he’ she referred to was. I didn't want to believe it. She might be just trying to get under my skin.

It isn't him.

I chanted the words like a mantra in my head over and over again willing to hell for it to be true.

“Come on, you know him” She said dismissively.

“Actually baby, To tell you the truth, we were extremely upset when you ran away because of some silly misunderstanding. We want to explain ourselves to you. And you have no idea how heartbroken he was when he realized you ran away from him” She said, her words laced in fake sadness making my skin crawl.

“Don't you dare start talking shit like that! You get me? Fucking stop” I hissed through gritted teeth.

“Your mother is right, girl. He is coming and is willing to accept you again. So be a good girl and don't throw any tantrums. He is giving you a second chance” My poor excuse of a father too decided to join the party, giving away his valuable advice.

I chuckled bitterly at their hardly concealed acting.

“How much money did he offer?”

“Money? what are y-”

“Cut the crap,Victoria. I know the truth and Alessia is not here for you to try and keep up the ‘nice parents’ act. I know you” I sneered in contempt.