Crowley wasn't an emotional person. He never much had much time for them nor did he understand them most of the time and so when he was in quite a state he decided to suffer alone until the angel noticed something was wrong.
Crowley had woken up from yet another nightmare. He dreamt about the same thing, he always did, the death of Aziraphale. Weather it was the angels or the bookshop fire, Aziraphale always ended up dying in his arms no matter how hard he tried to stop it, he never could.
On this occasion the demon had contemplated calling the angel just to make sure he was okay but he knew doing that would be stupid, he was fine...wasn't he?
Yes he was, he was just fine in his bookshop as always, he was worrying for nothing but he wasn't going back to sleep anytime soon so he got out of his bed, picked up his phone and made his way to the roof of his building.
Crowley would never admit it but the roof was his favourite place, other than the bookshop obviously. Crowley sat on the edge, he took out a cigarette from the pack in his pocket and clicked his fingers and a small flame of hellfire appeared on the tip of his finger, he lit the cigarette and shook his hand to get rid of the flame. Crowley simply looked over the city of London.
Aziraphale was sitting in his bookshop when he felt an immense wave of fear and panic flow through the air. He had no idea where it was coming from but he was going to find out, the emotion was powerful enough to make the angel very worried. Aziraphale put on his coat and walked out of his shop, locking the door behind him, he walked through the streets until he reached a building he knew, the building his demon lived in.
Aziraphale saw the red mop of the demon over the edge of the building and so he miracled himself up to the roof where he saw the demon sitting on the ground, smoking.
"Crowley, are you alright?"
Crowley's attention snapped towards the angel, he didn't want him to see him in the state he was still in after his nightmare.
"I'm fine angel"
The angel knew he was lying, he could see the demons bloodshot eyes and he heard the slight crack in his voice. All of this made the angel very worried.
Aziraphale sat down opposite the demon.
"You don't seem fine"
"I said I'm fine!" snapped Crowley, he instantly regretted his tone when he saw the look on the angels face and so he sighed "I....I'm sorry, I'm Just tired"
"Tired? Since when did you sleep?"
"Since the 1800's"
"Ahh....Well if you're so tired why don't you go to sleep?"
The demon looked at the angel like he had just been punched in the gut and of course the angel noticed this but chose to remain quiet for now as he gathered more information.
"Because I can't"
"Why not?"
"I just can't!" exclaimed the demon
Crowley looked away from the angel and over the city as he took a puff of his cigarette.
"Crowley if something is bothering you, you know you can tell me, Right?"
Crowley sighed and said "I don't do emotions angel"
"I know that but maybe you could tell me some another way, if it helps"
Crowley once again sighed but this time he looked the angel dead in the eyes and Aziraphale had a good look at the demon and was now very worried he had a tear in his eye, one that was blinked away as soon as the demon realised the angel had seen it.
"You trust me?" asked the demon
"Always"
"Give me your hand" said the demon holding out his hand
Aziraphale took the demons hand and was instantly transported into his mind. Crowley showed him his memories of his nightmares with excruciating detail.
When they came out of it Crowley was actively crying, he tried to stop the tears but ultimately failed. Aziraphale just sat there trying to process what he had just been shown which didn't take long after he saw the silent tears running down the demons cheeks.
Aziraphale moved and sat next to the demon who was just putting out his cigarette. Crowley looked at him for a second before the angel pulled him in for a hug which broke the dam holding in the flood of tears from pouring out.
"It's alright my dear, its okay to cry" said the angel as he wrapped his arms around the demon who was crying into his chest.
It had been some time before the demons tears were all cried out and he was just enjoying the comfort from the angel.
"Are you alright Crowley?"
Crowley sat up and looked away from the angel, he put his emotional walls back up and sealed them tight.
"M' fine"
"Don't, Don't do that, Don't put your walls back up, Crowley you don't have to be this emotionless being, you have to let someone in"
"I can't"
"Why not?" asked the angel
"I don't trust anyone enough"
"You trust me don't you?"
"It took me centuries to trust you fully Angel and I...I don't want you to see me like that"
"Like what?"
"I don't do emotions, not because I don't like them but because I don't understand them, its hard for me to know what I'm feeling and it makes me angry and I don't want you to see that"
"Oh Crowley, I have seen your anger and I am still here aren't I, I care about you dear boy but you can't just put all your emotions behind a wall, its not healthy"
"Its what I've always done, I don't know any other way"
"Then perhaps I could help you. Angels are very good at emotions"
Crowley turned his head to look at the angel who had a slight smile.
"Angel I..."
"You have to trust me Crowley as I trust you" said the angel as he took the demons hand.
"I....I do trust you angel"
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