Not Expecting to Collide (COMPLETE) - ABP Fanfiction

Chapter 55 - Vulnerable

Okay, I'm having serious issues with Wattpad today. I published earlier this afternoon only to discover that Wattpad posted an earlier draft version of this chapter. (Shakes fist as sky 'Curse you Wattpad!')

So to the people who were fast enough to catch this chapter the first time (Phew - you guys are fast! - I'm looking at you, Katdenham1998 and blujasschristmas.) Thank you for the votes but now you have to go back and re-read this chapter. Sorry. Not my fault Wattpad is harshing my mellow today.

Usually I heart Wattpad but today it bites the big gherkin (yes, that is an oxymoron.) XOX -PC

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October didn't say anything. She just bit her lip and watched as the emotions played across his face. She'd had almost five months to get used to the idea. He'd merely had a minute.

As she stood with her hands at her sides waiting for him to speak, she took the opportunity to really look at him unchecked. His hair had grown longer, now brushing the bottom of his shoulder blades. His curls had been streaked silver by the sun. The Alaskan daylight had coloured his skin to a deep bronze. The muscles in his arms tensed as he held his fists tightly closed. October's eyes traveled down his powerful chest to his lean, tapered waist wondering just how much he must have worked his body over the summer to become even more firm and solid since the last time she'd seen him. Her eyes moved back up to his, which were still opened wide in shock. She saw something in the deep blue depths that she had never seen before; that he had never allowed her to see before; that he had never allowed anyone to see before: Vulnerability.

"Damn, woman." He growled so low that it rumbled from deep in his chest. From those two words she couldn't tell if he was angry and for a split second she was afraid of his fabled temper.

Instead of running into his arms and apologizing and begging him to take her back, she chose to take the hard line. She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. "Okay, now it's your turn." She stated clearly.

His one eyebrow furrowed and his lip curled up ever so slightly. "My turn for what?" He asked, his words clipped and his temper simmering just below the surface.

"It's your turn to spill." She replied evenly. "To tell me exactly what it is you've been keeping from me."

"You haven't answered any of my questions yet." He ground out through clenched teeth.

"You haven't asked any. What do you want to know? I'll tell you anything." Her feet remained firmly planted in place.

"Is it mine?"

Who knew three short words could hurt so much? October closed her eyes and turned her head to the side as if she'd been struck on the cheek. If she had been standing close enough to him, she would have slapped his face. She told herself that he wasn't presently in control of his emotions or he would have never said something so hurtful towards her. Bam regretted the words even before he had said them. He clamped his lips shut over the immediate apology that wanted to roll off his tongue. He was lashing out and they both knew it.

"I won't dignify that with an answer." She replied without bringing her eyes back up to meet his.

"Why didn't you just get rid of it?"

Whether he was in control of his emotions or not, she wasn't going to be insulted like this in her own home. She crossed the kitchen in four quick strides and pulled her hand back to strike him. Bam was quicker though, and his hand shot up to circle around her wrist like a vice. It was the first physical contact they'd had since he'd made love to her in the trapper shack. Her eyes glittered into his expecting to see hate. Instead, he dropped her hand lamely and drew his body away from her. She gasped as she caught a glimpse of a scared little boy in his expression.

Her anger dissipated enough for her to calm herself slightly. October backed away further into the kitchen. She began filling the kettle with fresh water and pulling cups and saucers down from her cupboard. "I'm going to make a pot of tea. Then I'm going to go into my library and sit by the fire place." She kept her eyes on the task at hand, trying not to rattle the china with her trembling hands.

Bam remained still in the doorway with his lips pressed into a thin line. His eyes darted out the back window to look at the autumn leaves swirling in the wind at the bottom of October's yard. He looked like a caged animal. He felt the air in the room bearing down on him.

Once she poured the boiling water into the tea pot, she turned to face him again. "There are two doors to this room. One," She pointed to the door behind him. "goes into the library, where I will be waiting for you. The other," she pointed to the door she had entered from the yard previously, "will take you back to Alaska." She picked up her tea service tray and stopped in front of the library entrance. "It's your choice, Bam, but you need to know that once that door closes," She nodded towards the back door. "It's closed to you forever."

October swished past him through the doorway and set her tray down on the table. She poured two cups of peppermint tea, sat back on the couch and waited.