Not Expecting to Collide (COMPLETE) - ABP Fanfiction

Chapter 62 - Heartbeat

Making the decision to have a child - it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. -Elizabeth Stone

~*~

October laid on the hard, paper-covered, ultrasound bed as the technician glided the wand over her bare stomach. Bam sat on her other side in the uncomfortable, plastic chair, his entire body tensed tighter than a guitar string. The technician clicked away on her computer for a few moments in silence. October laid her hands on the table at her sides and tried not to think about her full bladder. She was keenly aware of the nervous energy coming off Bam when he moved closer to her side and threaded his fingers tightly into hers. The technician flipped a switch and pointed to the monitor on the opposite wall. "Here's what baby looks like today."

October watched Bam's face as the black and white image appeared in front of him. He gasped audibly as his eyes grew wide. He unconsciously brought October's hand to his mouth and placed a gentle kiss on her palm. The heat of his lips on her skin caused her entire body to warm a few degrees. His beard tickled the delicate flesh on the inside of her wrist reminding her just how long it had been since he had deliberately touched her with any sort of intimacy.

"This little flicker here," the technician pointed to the screen. "is baby's heart. It's going one-fifty-four beats per minute right now."

Bam watched the tiny speck of light rapidly fade and then go bright again. He could swear his own heart was keeping the same rhythm. And then he realized that that's exactly what it was - a piece of his very heart living outside of his body.

His heart.

Living.

His.

He quickly blinked away the tears that stung the back of his eyes. How could it be possible to love something so much?

His mind reeled. He wasn't ready for these emotions. He wasn't even aware that he was capable of these emotions, yet they hit him like a bulldozer coming at him full-on. Right in front of him was veritable proof that, even if he didn't know how to yet, he needed to change.
The technician spoke again. "Do you want to learn the sex of baby today?" October looked at Bam, whose eyes never left the monitor. He shook his head slightly.

It didn't matter to him whether the baby was a girl or a boy. What mattered most was that he became the man he needed to become. His eyes shone wetly in the blue light of the liquid crystal display. October turned back towards the technician and shook her head.

"Okay." the technician replied. "I just have to take a few measurements to make sure baby is growing at a normal rate and we will be done."

Bam's eyes never left the monitor, even when the technician switched it off and helped October back to a sitting position. "You can go ahead and get back in your own clothes. I'll send a copy of the photo to the front desk. You can pick it up on your way out." October held up two fingers and murmured. "Two copies please." The technician smiled. "Of course. See you next time."

~*~

Bam was quiet as they walked out of the clinic but the fact that his hand was firmly gripped around October's waist was not lost on her. He led her to the passenger side of her truck and held the door open for her to get in. Her eyes followed him as he walked around the front of the truck, got in and put the keys in the ignition. He sat in silence as he stared out the windshield at nothing.

"Bam?" October prodded gently after a long moment.

Bam shook his head as if to free himself of the cobwebs and started the truck. "Right." He mumbled. "Gas and groceries." October kept her smile to herself as they  turned out of the clinic parking lot.