Being friends with Lorena

27 // breaking

"I'm the same" I eventually spat out, "I just can't leave you alone, I don't even know why, it's something about you, I don't think I've ever come across someone like you." I admitted truthfully.

She sat there blinking at me, not saying a word. I felt awkward as hell, like I'd come across too needy, or too desperate. She'd probably get up in a minute and tell me to go hell.

"Nathan" she said in a hushed tone, "I'm scared, what if I like you?"

Scared? She was scared of liking me? Was I really that bad? I mean, okay I was a dickhead sometimes, well most of the time but was I really that bad that someone would be scared to like me? I was a good boyfriend to Ava, I knew I was and I probably could be again, was I that complicated?

"Say something" she prompted urgency lacing her voice, she looked worried almost terrified.

"What?" I replied blunter than I anticipated, "What are you scared about? Am I really that bad?"

"That what Kaycie says about you is true, she might be annoying to you but she's my best friend" Lorena said, "she says you were a bastard to her cousin, you know... I've seen you with other girls and-"

"I'm not like this with other girls" I said holding the bridge of my nose in annoyance, "Do you think I'm really this desperate with any other girl? When would I find the time to be? I spend all my time chasing you!"

"Hardly" she rolled her eyes, "You're always with other girls!"

"What?" I said in astonishment, "I'm never with anyone?! You're unbelievable, how can you be so jealous when you already told me I wasn't allowed to catch any feelings towards you?"

"I'm jealous because I like you" she blurted out, her eyes widened when she finished realising what she'd just said, she couldn't take it back. I'd already heard it, it had already replayed twenty times over in my head. "What do you think it's like for me? You were going to kiss Paisley earlier, I can't keep this up!" She pointed between us.

"Why are you so hot and cold with me?" I asked, "We literally had sex half hour ago and now your breaking it off with me?"

"Breaking what off? It's not like we were anything in the beginning" she was blunt, her eyes burning right into me as she said it, "Breaking what off?"

"You know exactly what I mean Lorena" I snapped, "Don't be like this."

"It's finished, whatever" she shrugged grabbing her phone, she waited a second before putting it to her ear.

"Stop being stupid" I said reaching out to her, she stepped back not wanting me to touch her.

"Hi Adam?" She said as the person answered, I couldn't believe it. She was really gonna run back to him after saying all this to me? After telling me she liked me?
"Yeah can you pick me up from campus?"

"Lorena-"

"Okay see you soon" she cut me off, putting her phone in her bag she started grabbing her clothes.

"Are you really gonna run back to him? Are you really gonna do this to me?" I asked her, I sounded desperate but right now I didn't care.

"You're just using me" she snapped, "and it's my own fault, I asked you too."

"I'm not using you!" I half shouted,

"I'm finishing it right here because I can't deal with this anymore" she said calmly, she gave me a small sympathetic smile.

"But I like you too," I said in urgency.

"You don't" she replied, "you just don't want this to end, you want me for one thing.. I really don't blame you, this whole thing was my fault. I made up the rules and now I face the consequences."

"Lorena?" I said as she approached the door, "don't leave me hanging."

She didn't give me a second glance before she slammed the door behind her.

Why did things always escalate so quickly with her?