Being friends with Lorena

32// Games

"I'm sorry for slapping you" Lorena said as she buttoned up her jeans in the back seat, I glance down at her shaky hands as she attempted to pop the stud shut. I can't believe we had sëx in my car, what a great first date.

"It's fine, I'm sorry" I shrugged, she was acting different. I thought maybe she was embarrassed about earlier, there was some kind of tension in the air. "You wanna go home?" I asked.

She nodded pulling herself in the front seat, she didn't say a word. Her arms came up and she hugged herself, she didn't even look at me. I didn't know what to say, or what I'd even done.

"Lorena?" I said firmly prompting her to look at me, "what's up?"

As her eyes met mine they were filled with tears, she squeezed them shut and shook her head gently.
"What are we doing?" She said in a hushed tone, "when is this going to stop?"

"Why does it have to stop?" I felt panicked, why did she change her mind so quickly? After what she said before I thought she'd want to keep me around, I thought she might of liked me.

"I don't know if I can take it" she answered wiping her tears, "your so rude when Ava's around... You're different and when summer-"

"I'm sorry about before" I said, "honestly, I don't know what comes over me sometimes."

I grabbed her hand and lightly kissed her knuckles, she squeezed her eyes back shut and pulled away.

"Whatever this is" I spoke again, "don't finish it... I know you feel it too" I felt silly admitting it, I felt foolish like I'd just opened myself up for rejection.

It seemed like minutes before she spoke again, "I do feel it Nathan" she agreed, "but that's the problem, I don't want too."

I dropped her hand and gripped the steering wheel. I felt like she was playing me, like this was just a game to her. This was getting too deep, I couldn't keep up with her moods. I turned the engine on, and she started protesting about something but I didn't listen. I wanted to get as far away from her as I could, I was even contemplating going home and missing the end of this college year. I couldn't bear seeing her and having to ignore her, or her ignoring me.

"Nathan say something!" Lorena snapped harshly, "you're so much hard work!"

"Me?" I said sarcastically, "it ain't fair that you keep doing this! It's hard work for me Lorena, fück!" I hit the steering wheel in frustration, it's like she had a kick in getting me angry.

"Is this a game to you?" I snapped, "because I'm starting to feel like it is?!"

Lorena's facial expression changed, she looked almost shocked. She didn't speak, instead she tore her eyes from mine and glanced out the window.

"Well?!" I demanded.