In Omnia Paratus (AU) - Book 2

After Storm

I woke up a complete mess. Mascara smudge under my eyes and my dress riding up my leg. I glanced across at the floor to see my jacket, bag and high heels flung in all directions and messing up my room.

I couldn't really function to the point of getting out of bed just yet. I felt weird and dirty. Laid out on my bed after a night of crying myself to sleep feeling nothing but guilty. I can't imagine how Lily felt right now.

It was times like this that I wish I could speak to my mum. I needed someone to tell me everything was going to be alright and I hadn't mucked up the best friendship I'd made since before my mum died.

I pulled myself out of bed and removed my make up quickly as it felt grim all clustered on my face.

I threw off my dress and put on some leggings and top, matched with an old hoodie. I had nowhere to go today.

I didn't want to leave the room, nor did I want to leave dorm. I didn't know if Lily was there or not but I heard some movement that morning.

Eating habits were returning to normal, I'd feel hungry at lunchtime. But today I felt more sick to my stomach than I ever had done before at the thought of food.

- - - - -

"She's hurting." Lucy said to Olivia looking across at Lily at lunch.

"She can hear you." Lily grumbled at the pair of them.

"What happened?" Olivia asked gently.

"Nothing." Lily spat. Olivia looked directly at Lucy for information.

"Something to do with Jenna, I don't know all the details." Lucy smiled gossiping her head off, it was the only thing she knew how to do apparently.

"Its always Jenna that winds her up." Olivia complained resting a hand on Lily's shoulder.

"You shouldn't be mad at her." Lily sighed.

"What?" Lucy frowned.

"Well, she did nothing to you." She huffed sitting up straight and looking around the canteen, presumably for Matt. She then left without any explanation and the two girls looked puzzled.

- - - - -

I ventured out of the room when I heard Lily had gone. I took a shower, got re-dressed and tied my hair back. I sat down to watch tv, hoping it would take my mind off things. My phone rang and I looked over at it resting on the coffee table.

It was Richard for about the 10th time that morning. I let it go to voicemail.

"Hi Jen, look give me a call when you get this message. I'm really worried about you Ace--" I heard his voice ring through my head but I just turned up the TV louder and drowned out the rest of the message.

Lily walked in when the TV was blaring loud and she widened her eyes at me stopping briefly to look. I knew she was only popping back to dorm before she went back out again so I didn't move.

I lowered the volume and counted the minutes she was in her room for. When it was longer than 10 minutes I thought she might be staying there for a while so I left dorm with my phone and my card in hand in case I needed food or money.

- - - - -

I flicked down the corridors wasting time before finally deciding fresh air was a good idea. I stayed on the grounds and walked through the field, littered with groups of friends varying all ages.

I went past the tree-houses remembering the events of last year and almost breaking a smile. I thought about climbing up there but I wasn't in the mood.

"Jen." I heard a distant call but assumed it wasn't for me because I was in a particularly crowded place.

It didn't occur to me till later that it might of actually been for me but oh well.

Richard wandered the corridors of Ashford desperately trying to find Jenna after checking her dorm and seeing no one there, in any room.

It took him an hour and he almost gave up until he saw her. Walking around with little to no make up on and in cozy clothes clutching her phone and her wallet of cards.

He dialled her number and waited for her to either pick up or ignore him. She looked at the buzzing phone in her hand and ignored its ring. He hung up and sighed.

"Jenna." Richard called out and her glance moved from the door she was about to go through to the end of the corridor where he was stood. "Jen." He made a light jog as until reached her.

"Hi." I smiled as best as I could as I saw Richard approach me. God I hope he didn't see me ignore his call.

"Is everything okay? I was worried, I called you, left messages but you didn't answer..." He said slowly.

"Phones broken." I hummed emotionlessly.

"Your phones in your hand, and lit up." Richard said reaching forward and grabbing my hand. I reluctantly let him see my phone fully working. "What's going on?" He said slowly pulling me to the side out of the way of people trying to get through the door.

"I don't uh-- I don't want to talk about it." I hummed looking away from him.

"Have you eaten today?" He asked.

I shook my head as I looked away trying not to cry. "I need to go." I said, "I need some sleep."

"Alright come here." He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around my small frame and pulled me close to him and I breathed in his after shave and sighed trying my hardest not to let any tears slip.

I didn't question what he had said to Oliver when they left, that was a conversation for another day.

I left him there and went back to dorm on my own and slept until the evening. After not really sleeping the night before.