In Omnia Paratus (AU) - Book 2

What now?

"Hey everything okay?" Richard asked me as he came in the room after me crying for like an hour straight with Matt sat there comforting me.

"Great, fine yeah." I mumbled as he sat down beside me.

"We're gunna sort this out I promise." I placed an arm around me and kissed my temple and I dramatically dissolved into tears again. "Hey, it's okay." He whispered over and over again.

I blubbered to him about Maisie and Lily and everything but he just shushed me and told stroked my hair, telling me everything was fine and that I should try and get some sleep before he takes me to see Kate in the morning.

- - - - -

"Where are you going?" Richard asked the next morning as I got out of bed and opened the wardrobe staring at my clothes for like 5 minutes as I woke up slowly.

"The paper. Then class." I mumbled.

"You're blowing off class." Richard said to me. "And don't bother with the paper, please." He continued.

"I have to."

"No, you're sanity is more important. We're going to Kate this morning, I've already called her in advance and told her you're coming." Richard explained to me.

"Ok, can we just stop by the paper and check something out quickly?" I begged.

"Sure, fine." He agreed eventually.

- - - - -

We must of looked like the least most attractive couple that day. I was in one of his hoodies and leggings and he was in a sweatshirt and jeans and neither of us had showered that morning. I hadn't bothered with much make up and he didn't gel his hair.

I had my arm wrapped around him most of the time as we walked around school and then if not, I was holding his hand because all of a sudden I'd grown this attachment to him. He had reading week at university and was meant to be studying but instead he just spent the night at my place constantly.

I missed him all the time and I loved him for still caring about me no matter what.

"So am I crazy?" I asked Kate as we sat down in her office and I leant against Richard.

"You're not crazy." Kate laughed shuffling some papers. "To me, it's sounds like you're just wrapped up in guilt and I recommend with the Lily thing that you chat with her about that, the Maisie thing... Hun that was not your fault."

"But--"

"Jen no, please understand that what happened to Maisie was nothing to do with you, it was complete chance, you did nothing wrong." Kate tried to explain but I didn't want to listen.

"The doctors-- they said I was too young and... well I was I was too young, I destroyed people's lives by not getting rid of her the minute I found out I was pregnant. I shouldn't have done it--"

"Please stop talking like that." Richard whispered to me and placed an arm around me comfortingly.

"It's true, I affected everyone's lives. Richards, his parents, my dad, Lily, Matt, pretty much everyone I spoke to. I disappointed everyone saying I was having a kid and then she only goes and dies. God I must look like an idiot to all of them." I raised my voice just getting frustrated.

"Getting yourself worked up is not helping." Kate lectured me.

"What else can I do?" I yelled and then regretted it. I sat back and went silent. "I'm sorry, I just want to go now." I whispered.

"We'll talk tomorrow." Kate raised her eyebrows and I just pushed Richard towards the door, eager to get out of this stupid room and just cry and moan to him.

- - - - -

"She's alright." Kate told Richard later that day.

"Alright? That meeting went terribly." Richard moaned.

"She got agitated, yes, but i expected that. At least she didn't do something crazy and she's willing to talk about the guilt now." Kate explained to him in simple terms, even though her notes said completely different things.

"She's not like.. mentally ill?" Richard wondered.

"I wouldn't go there just yet and you would need someone a bit more professional for that but I'd say she definitely has a eating disorder and she should seek medical attention. I can tell her, but she's more likely to listen to you." She continued,

"I'll tell her tonight. She won't like it, but I'll tell her." Richard scoffed before saying goodbye and walking off down the corridor.

- - - - -

Richard was walking back to the uni campus to finally get some work done this week and get some more clothes if he was going to be staying at Jenna's for any longer this week.

It was late afternoon and in the February it got dark pretty quickly still so it was pretty dull.

When he got to his dorm he decided to phone Jenna quickly, to see if there was anything she needed before he walked back past all the shop to come back to her dorm.

He hadn't actually seen her since she stormed off after the meeting but they had texted a little bit. He found it weird that she didn't answer her phone after a few rings but then on like the 5th ring, he did think that something was up.

Though, he ignored it and just started walking back to her dorm and by now it was night time and pitch black.

His phone started to ring and he answered it straight away expecting it to be Jenna.

It wasn't.

"Hi, is this Richard madden?"

"Oh uh yes yeah." He stuttered un-expectantly.

"I'm phoning from the emergency room--" and straight away his breath disappeared and he almost choked from where he couldn't function properly. "We've got Jenna Coleman in."

He slammed his phone down literally ran back to his campus because he was closer to his still and jumped in his car. He was terrified, what had she done now?