In Omnia Paratus (AU) - Book 2

Hurting

Richard was being transferred back to his house today. I wished he had gone back to his uni flat and so did he but he was in such a state, he could hardly walk.

Going back to his house meant someone was always there, watching what we were doing, his mum, dad, sisters. Even the maid was always wondering around. So I sat with him all day in the hospital before he was moved home.

"I'm going to come with you. Then Matt said he'd pick me up from your house later on when you need to sleep." I nodded holding Richards hand and smiling at him gently.

"Ok cool."

"I have to let go for them to take you." I laughed looking down at our hands.

"That's okay. Just one more minute." He smiled and closed his eyes, he was doing much better but he was tired all the time and suffered with insomnia most of the time he was in the hospital.

I noticed he had fallen asleep and then slipped my hand away from his, queuing the doctors to load him into an ambulance. I got in with him and watched him sleep peacefully.

- - - - -

"Are you comfortable?" I asked putting yet another pillow behind his head, because you can never have too many, well he may have too many now. I worried for him.

"I'm definitely not uncomfortable." He smirked. "Yes I am fine."

"Great, so... well Lily has her thing today. Where she tries to start walking again and matts come to pick me up so I can see how Lily's doing." I nodded hoping he'd understand.

"Go, don't feel bad. You spent almost a week in hospital with me already." Richard sighed. "Kiss?"

"Thank you." I smiled and leant forward and pecked his lips. "Love you. See you later." I left him be with his family for a few hours and thought he could get some sleep while I'm not here.

"Matt hey." I said stepping out the front of the house and jumping in the passengers seat.

"Hey how's he doing?" Matt asked.

"He's alright, yeah." I smiled. "You ready to go?"

"Do you mind if I took you back to ashford rather than to pick up Lily?" Matt spoke as if he was hiding something and I frowned as he looked over at me and tried to smile.

"Uh why?" I asked.

"It's just, I don't think you should see Lily right now." He nodded.

"Why, what's happened?"

"The course is tough, she can feel her legs now sure, but trying to walk after 6 months of never walking is extremely hard for her. It's like watching a child learn to walk again but when they fall it's worse." Matt sighed.

"I want to see."

"Jenna I don't think it's a good idea especially after what happened--" Matt shook his head annoyed.

"She told you about the scars then huh? Told you about the new ones as well?" I raised my eyebrows and then as if I wanted to frighten him I just went for it and held out my arm and before he even had the chance to look away to close his eyes I pulled my jumped sleeves up and showed him everything.

"Jenna--"

"That's not all." I said with a sinister sort of grin on my face and then pulled up the other sleeve, followed by a small lift of my top to reveal my stomach. "They're all old, all reminding me of a shit day in my life but some are fresh too and what makes you think you can stop me?"

"If you're going to do it anyway, I'll just go straight to Victoria." Matt was a little scared to be honest.

"If I'm going to do it anyway, I may as well see Lily first!" I smiled and then pulled my sleeves down like nothing had even happened. "Let's go." I grinned.

- - - - -

Matt was right, everything he said was right. I was watching Lily though the glass in the door into the room where she was learning to walk again. She was holding on to two bars her feet on the group relatively flat and she was talking to Matt.

I watched and she tried to move her foot forward but she looked pained and Matt was talking to her, telling her everything was okay and making that step wasn't important.

Then she gave up, he arms gave way and suddenly Matt and the nurse had to leap forward and grab her arms and gently settle her on the wheelchair behind her.

"I think that's enough for the day." I heard someone say and then I saw the lingering tears in Lily's eyes start to pour, she must of really wanted to take that step today and she couldn't.

I went back to the car because it gave time for Lily to recover and not have to see me when she was in such a state.

I cried too as I sat in the car alone. I reached that dark pit I was in when I first found out she couldn't walk and I started to really hurt on the inside and now on the outside as well.

- - - - -

"Fuck fuck fuck, it's Maisie's birthday tomorrow." Richard clutched his forehead as he woke up and then saw his sister sat with him.

"Your daughter?" She smiled across at him.

"Yeah, yeah..." Richard sighed and he calmed himself a little from how he had woken up from such a nightmare, probably reliving the whole thing again.

"How old would she be?" Charlotte asked.

"2." He smiled.

"Wow."

"Yeah like a real person, that would talk and everything. But we just couldn't seem to make that happen could we?" He scoffed and turned his head away from her.

"What did you have planned for tomorrow?" Charlotte asked.

"I was going to take Jen somewhere amazing, and then she got travel sick last time we did that so I cancelled that. I was going to take her out for dinner but that's just the evening. I was going to whisk her away somewhere, anywhere but where ever we go... she's still there. Maisie."

"It's our wedding anniversary tomorrow." Charlotte laughed gently.

"Oh yeah. We went to your wedding last year to distract ourselves." He smiled. "I can't even get out of bed so what use am I to her now?"

"Stop her hurting herself all day long? Keep her sitting with you where you can watch her... yeah dad tells me what you tell him. Im the eldest I need to know these things." Charlotte added.

"That's all I can do. Just about."