In Omnia Paratus (AU) - Book 2

Not okay

"All alright?" Lily asked me the next morning as I went past her to grab my jacket and my purse.

"Oh yeah, fine." I gave her a huge smile and moved past her and left out of the door as quickly as possible. It wasn't that I was ignoring her, I was just busy.

"Jen?" She called after me as I stood waiting in line for coffee. "Where are you going?"

"I have class in just over half an hour so I'm getting a coffee and hitting the paper so I don't have to go tonight." I hummed.

"You do have to go tonight. It's the staff meeting." Lily sighed crossing her arms as she waited in line with me.

"Yes but I can't do any work during the staff meeting. Plus I have a crazy essay due tomorrow that I'm working on in my first class so I can't be late sorry--" I said trying to close the conversation.

"--sorry?" Lily stuttered completely crazed by it all. "I'll see you at break okay?" She huffed walking off.

"Alright."

- - - - -

"You okay?" Jack asked Lily as she sat down with the group for breakfast.

"Nope." She huffed looking across at Matt.

"Wanna talk?" Jack asked.

"Nope." She repeated. He backed off and sat back chatting away to Oliver and Matt leaned in for conversation.

"So you didn't come to dinner last night. Anything to do with the foul mood you're in?" Matt asked.

"Yep." Lily said looking down at her food.

"Jenna?"

"Yep."

"Are we only conversing in one word answers?" Matt snapped.

"Look Matt I can't really---" Lily started to speak but suddenly Oliver decided to take part in the conversation.

"Wheres Jenna?" Oliver piped up leaning in to Lily and Matt.

"Not available." Matt snapped trying to hear Lily out.

- - - - -

"No." I said trying to get through to useless writers that came in to me making excuses for tonight. Saying they can't come.

"Why are you here if you're so sick then?" I scoffed at one of them.

I hated people not willing to commit. I set aside one evening a month and they can't be bothered to turn up.

"Jen I can't possibly come to tonight's meeting." Oliver joked coming into the office before I was about to leave for class.

"Ive had enough of that thanks." I smiled gently grabbing my papers. "See ya." I said not even making the effort to talk to him. He gave me a funny look as I locked up the office without one word, not one silly joke.

- - - - -

"Lunch?" Lily said walking into my room around lunchtime as I was working on my essay. She was holding sandwiches and burgers probably got both to see what I fancied.

"I'm ok." I smiled kind of ignoring her.

"Jenna put your pen down." She scoffed angrily.

"I can't--"

"Pen!" She snapped grabbing it out of my hand and throwing it across the room.

"Hey!" I said turning around in my chair.

"Sorry do you not remember what happened last night?" Lily screamed as if she'd been bottling it up.

"Last night..."

"I don't like seeing you like that, melting down and crying on my shoulder. You're not like that. You've never done that before except when you're drunk and crying over Richard--"

"I know--"

"--but you were fully sober and that was real Jen." She shouted. "I understood what you said last night that these past few months have been difficult but I'm trying to help and you're ignoring me."

"I'm sorry okay?" I hummed looking at her sadly.

"Please just eat this." She held out the food in her hand.

"It's not that easy--" I started to raise my voice.

"Well it's not that hard!" She screamed as I had obviously pushed her to her limit. "Because the next thing is I hold you down and feed it to you so just bloody do it Jen. Stop worrying about school and the paper and just relax for a minute!" She yelled back in my face.

- - - - -

"Okay I apologise." Lily said holding back my hair as I heaved over the toilet bowl only 30 seconds later.

"This isn't your fault." I puffed a laugh out before sitting back against the toilet wall.

"Maybe my technique wasn't quite right. I'll read those leaflets you gave me and get back to you." She smiled sitting down opposite me.

"Thank you." I smiled.

"That's okay." She shrugged and we sat in silence for a bit just chilling.

"Party in the bathroom?" Oliver and Matt walked in as we hadn't bothered to move we were just chatting away on the floor near the toilet.

"Something like that." I smiled up at them both.

"Meeting at the paper soon should we get going?" Oliver asked looking around at the rest of us who all also needed to go the meeting. I'm running it, Lily and Ollie were writers and Matt did photographs.

"Yes!" I smiled standing up and I had to admit I didn't see it coming at all. I felt lightheaded as u tried to get up and clutched at the wall but it didn't help. I just remember thinking that I was in shit with Victoria. I blacked out and couldn't see anything but I could still hear everyone. I could feel someone's hand holding my wrists keeping me up.

I was just chanting out the fact that I could see and everyone around me was saying "don't worry" and "let's get you sat down." I soon properly blacked out and couldn't hear a thing.

I guess that's why they called an ambulance.