Color

Thirty Three

Mitch promised himself he wasn't gonna cry over this. 

But he didn't turn Kirstie's hug down, nor did he decline when Alex offered to hold him until he fell asleep. 

Mitch woke up the next morning, laying across the couch, with Alex sitting on the edge of the couch close to him but not quite touching him. 

Alex was speaking softly to Kirstie, standing across the room from him. "Avi told me, Kirstie. That's how I know."

Kirstie shook her head slowly, not looking at him. "I can't believe he would do that... I thought he stopped smoking?"

"He did. I know he did. So I have no idea why he'd start now..?"

"Well... This is the first stressful situation he's had to be in without Mitch around to help him cope."

"He could've just opened up to Mitch instead of biting his head off. Then he wouldn't have to smoke at all."

"I know... I know..."

"Did Mitch talk to you at all about what he said...? I know they argued, but..."

"He said he didn't wanna talk about it. Just wanted to go to sleep. But..." Alex frowned a little at the thought. "He did ask me if I thought he was an ugly kind of skinny."

Kirstie looked over finally, which is when she saw that Mitch was waking up. She walked over quickly. "Mitch? Honey, are you awake?"

Mitch nodded slowly, sitting up and scooting back to lean his back against the arm rest. "Yeah... Have I been asleep long..?"

Alex put a hand on Mitch's knee. "No.. Babe, how are you..? Seems like.. You and Scott had it pretty rough yesterday."

Kirstie spoke quickly. "Do I need to beat him up? Or should I call him and--?"

"No." Mitch interrupted tiredly. "Don't... Leave him alone, alright?"

"What? Absolutely not."

Alex tried to explain. "Mitch, he crossed a line when he made a remark about your body type. That was bullshit. Even I'm gonna have a hard time forgiving him for that, and he's not even--"

"You guys." Mitch began. "I'm serious. Please... Just let me handle this, okay?"

Kirstie stared at him, and then walked toward the kitchen. "I'm gonna make some breakfast."

Alex turned to Mitch, trying an even gentler tone. "Babe, they're... They're coming home today. And if you guys are still arguing, you're free to stay in my room. Avi can stay with Scott instead."

"Okay... Thank you."

Alex pat Mitch's thigh gently with his hand. "Anything you need... Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah. I'm good. I'm just a little worried, because... I'm not really sure which version of Scott is gonna come home today."

*

Unfortunately, when Scott came home, Mitch couldn't help but be distracted by all the bruises on his face. 

Avi immediately went to find Alex down the hall, leaving Scott to close the front door and drop his bag on the floor.

Scott walked toward Mitch, who was walking toward him as well. Scott stared at him for a second. "Mitch... Can I just--?"

Mitch held up a hand. "I don't wanna hear it, Scott... I really don't." He met Scott's eyes, face portraying all the pain he felt. "I love you, and I understand what you're going through. But... How could you say that to me?"

Scott looked away quickly, unable to face Mitch. "I'm... I don't know. Mitch, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean... I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't."

"You've been so sweet to me these past few weeks, and.. I understand that something terrible happened to influence the words out of your mouth. But just because you were upset with someone doesn't mean you can take it out on me."

"I know that." Scott finally tried to meet his eyes. "I'm so sorry, Mitch... You didn't deserve that... And I can't even blame it on alcohol, or anything but myself. It was all my fault, and... And I understand if you're mad at me. Please, be mad. I deserve it."

Mitch stared at him, wanting nothing more than to reach out and hug him. "I... I'm not mad. But... It really does hurt to hear the same voice that says they love you every day, tell me how ugly and imperfect--"

"Don't, Mitch... I know I deserve it, but... Please don't say it, I can't bear to listen to it."

"Just be honest with me, okay? Do you... Do you really think that about me..?"

Scott stepped forward with his arms out, but immediately pulled his hands away, holding them up in surrender because he knew better. "No, of course I don't. You're the most gorgeous boy I've ever met, and I'm always jealous of you, and I know everyone stares at you, and your body is phenomenal and you're amazing and--"

Mitch couldn't help it. He hugged him quickly, before pulling away. "Scott, please don't do that. Please... I've been upset about this all night, and then you just walk in here, and your stupid blue eyes and..."

Scott watched him carefully. "Mitch, I know I don't deserve it... But can I please... Please have a kiss? Please?"

Mitch nodded quickly, stepping forward quickly to kiss him, physically falling into it as he nearly melted at Scott's touch.

Scott pulled away quickly, grabbing Mitch's upper arms to keep him at arms length. "Please know that I love your body, and it's beautiful and wonderful and you always make such great decisions with what you eat, I know you take pride in that, and... I shouldn't have said such awful things."

"I know... I know your dad brings out the worst in you.. But he's gone, okay? And your face is gonna heal, and all the other bruises are gonna heal, and... And we're gonna heal. Okay?"

Scott nodded slowly, looking down at the ground again. "I'm gonna... Go shower, I think. Will you be out here when I get back?"

"You don't want me to go with you?"

Scott didn't even look up. He knew Mitch was gonna do that. "No... No. I want you to.. To think about this, okay? I want you to decide if you can forgive me or not. And.. Think about shit you need to say to me."

Mitch nodded slowly. "Okay. I understand."

Scott didn't speak again, he just paused for a moment, and then walked down the hall.

**