Type Of Story: 1D Fanfic
Author: Noureeeeen
Story Rating: R
Reads: 2,424
Votes: 388
Comments: 439
Description:
Bethany, a 20 young girl with a rich father, millions of dollars under her feet, goes on a simple vacation to Egypt. Little did she know that this simple vacation will change her and change her life, make some problems and maybe solve some, when she woke up finding jade green eyes piercing into her own dark ones
"Oh my God! Who the hell are you?"
"I...um I I..."
Suggested If: You like AU Harry fics
My Review: I think the plot goes kinda fast, but overall I like it. It's simple, but it's cute too. I like your chapter lengths and your spelling/grammar is pretty good, there are just a few things I'd work on when it comes to spelling and grammar. These things include:
-You do NOT have to put a comma after dialogue, though you get better at not doing this as the story progresses. (What I'm talking about is, you'd put something "like this,", except you don't need a comma on the outside of the quotation marks, just the inside).
-The occasional mixup of your/you're and there/their/they're. You're pretty good about that most of the time though.
-An occasional spelling error.
However, overall, your grammar and spelling is good. Overall the story isn't the best in the world, but it's pretty decent for a first fanfic (:
Note To Author: Sorry for not getting this review out sooner omg
Rating (1-5): 3
Other Notes: To ze readers: there's some smut in the story so I wouldn't read, or simply skip over, that scene if you don't like it
