i'm sorry that i fell for you -jaegan-

chapter fifty one - i promise

justins p.o.v

after we talked for a while, and i mean a while, i had to start heading home to do my homework. he walked me downstairs. his parents were in their room almost sleep because it was sort of late but not too late. it's starting to get dark.

"i had fun." he says coming closer to me and wrapping his arms around me as we stand in front of his front door.

"me too baby." i say without thinking and he blushed hardcore, looking at me. "i'm so proud of you, the way you've been trying your absolute best to remember your life. especially me." i wrap my arms around his neck lightly.

"thank you, that's all i want right now."  he says and i smile, glancing at his lips quickly. i just want to feel his lips on mine again but i need to wait. he hasn't looked at my lips really so that be a sign.

"i'll text you, okay?" i ask and he nods. he kisses my forehead sweetly. "bye." i open his front door and the first thing that catches my eye is the sunset. it's beautiful.

"woah." i hear him say. "wait, don't leave yet." he slips his shoes on and grabs my hand, bringing me outside onto his front steps.

he sits down and i sit along with him. "five more minutes." he keeps our fingers interlocked and i realize he wants me to stay so we can watch the sunset together. oh my god, this boy.

"of course." i say and look back at the sky. he does the same thing as we stay close together.

this felt like a movie. or a dream. something like that. i never imagined it turning out this good after i found out rae wouldn't remember me. but it's one hundred percent better than i thought. i know he's been trying and that's how i know he's in there. the boy who i went through everything with it still in there.

when i zone back into what's happening, i realize the sun has almost gone all the way down. raegan is also staring right at me. i look over quickly, our eyes catching each other's.

"you are so handsome." he says quietly, seeming a little shy. the freaking butterflies in my stomach right now wow.

"stooop." i whine smiling cutely as i look back up at the sky. it's still such a magnificent color.

"no, i-" he almost stutters nervously as the tip of his finger goes under my chin. he tilts my head towards him and i notice his eyes finally looking at my lips.

he leans in slowly and i do the same, and soon our eyes are closed and our lips connect for a quick moment. he didn't make it long which i understand. that little kiss is what i've needed so bad these past few days.

"you what?" i ask as we keep our faces close.

"i was going to say i really want to kiss you. but i figure i'll just do it." he smiles and i just continue to look at him in awe.

"i'm glad you did...was it okay?" i ask him. he nods slowly and gently leans in, kissing me once more. this time a little bit longer.

i put my hand on my cheek and kiss back, feeling my face get as hot as ever. he pulls away and backs up a little, freaking out.

"god i'm sorry for making you wait so long for that. that was perfect. that whole moment was just perfect." he tells me and i couldn't be happier with what he just said.

"it was." i nod. "i missed that so much."

"i'm going to remember. i-i need to remember. everything." he stands up off the steps and looks at me, rubbing the back of his head.

"don't force yourself rae." i tell him, standing up as well.

"that was the best feeling i've ever felt but i'm sure that's not true considering what you've told me we've done in the past, i just need to remember you. us. every little single detail about us." he grabs my hand again and comes close. "i'll talk to you to tomorrow, get some good sleep because i sure as hell won't. i will remember if it's the last thing i do. tonight."

"raegan you need sleep-"

"no no what i need is you. and i feel like we are not complete unless i know everything." he cuts me off and this is the cutest thing i've ever experienced. "it just bothers me how if it was the old me, we could have talked about more fun things tonight and i definitely would have just kissed you harder than i did because i wouldn't be so afraid."

"hey it's okay. you're doing the best you can." i say quickly, cupping his cheeks.

"no i'm not. the best i can do it remembering everything!" he says. then he looks into my eye intensely. "go home, drive safely and go to sleep."

he kisses me cheek before running to the door and going inside. "i promise i will remember justin. i love you!"

"i love you more." i answer and he just smiles, shutting his front door. i walk to my car and get inside, it taking me a minute to just process everything.

he kissed me. twice. they were good. he was happy with it. he's so determined  fo remember and it's so adorable. i hope he does but i don't want him sleep deprived over it. he's too much.

i drive home safely and when i arrive at my house, i don't go inside yet. i just sit there, wishing rae was still next to me. he's so adorable. i'm really in love with this kid.

remember raegan!!! ahh
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