The Good Hair Family Sitcom

S3 E3.1: Chicks Be Crazy

TJ's POV

"Wyatt, you ready?" I call up the stairs.

My son comes blasting down in his basketball uniform, saying, "Sorry. I had to find my lucky socks."

At that, Cyrus comes winding around the stairwell out of the kitchen with a disappointed look on his face.

"Someone put them in your laundry basket," Wyatt goes on.

"Strange," Cyrus responds, even though I'm pretty sure he knows exactly how they got there. "Clearly something wants your socks washed. Maybe you should take it as a sign."

"No. Washing ruins them," Wyatt denies.

"Washing prevents foot fungus," Cyrus counters.

"It gets rid of the luckiness. Papa gets it."

Cyrus looks to me in concern. "Please tell me you wash your socks."

"Yes," I assure him.

"Papa knows the importance of your lucky charm to win a basketball game," Wyatt explains more. Didn't you have one?"

"Yeah," I say, "but mine was your dad."

"See!" Wyatt says like that proves his theory. "You didn't wash Dad. Otherwise he would've lost his luck."

"I didn't wash people people that often," I respond. "That's not really a hobby I got into."

"Plus, I did shower," Cyrus argues. "Maybe your socks can shower too."

"Socks can't take showers," Wyatt shuts down.

"They won't lose their luck," Cyrus promises.

"But they will, and I need it so that I can get Kill Them All 3."

This is the first I'm hearing of this, and it takes me by surprise.

"That M-rated video game?" I say.

"Yeah."

Cyrus looks equally as confused. "Why would winning help you get that?"

"Because you promised me you'd get it if I won my game."

Cyrus and I both look at each other at the exact same time. I don't remember making this promise, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. Wyatt's only twelve, and sure, I'm not exactly strict with what I allow him to do, but an M-rated game is a bit too far. Maybe when he's thirteen, but not twelve. But Cyrus must've promised it to Wyatt, and I don't want to undermine him, so I don't speak up about my opinion.

"Uh, right," I say.

"I'm gonna win and get my game, so I need my lucky socks full of luckiness," Wyatt states.

Cyrus takes another moment to process that before saying, "Um, okay, let's go to the car."

Cyrus opens the front door, and he walks with Wyatt out to the car, while I wait for the last person in the family to get down here. It's only a few more seconds before she does, walking down in a shiny, blue slip dress like she's going to a dinner date rather than a middle school basketball game.

"Why do I have to go to Wyatt's games?" she complains as she descends the stairs. "All he does is head-butt the ball and get benched."

"Yeah, well, he came to all your dance recitals as a kid."

"He was a baby. He couldn't drive to the mall instead."

"Still, all you did was copy the people beside you when that wasn't even your part to dance."