Imagines | Shawn Mendes

6.9 + storm

"I know everything will be alright
I know everything is alright
I know you didn't bring me out here to drown"

❃

Things aren't the same anymore, he doesn't hold me as tight as before, his eyes don't sparkle like they use to and he doesn't kiss me as passionately. I miss it, I miss it all. We don't talk anymore either, we live together and I don't know what he did today. It scares me because I think it's too late to fix it, to fix us. If there even is an us anymore.

Sitting here thinking about it deeply I broke out into tears, I could feel the warm tears triple down my face. I pulled my knees up to my chest and held them tight imagining it was him comforting me. My head fell back being engulfed by the waves of pillows and my hands grabbing the blankets like they were holding my hand back. The rain was hitting the window as the moonlight was shinning through being the only light I've seen lately.

"Write a song with me?" Shawn asked while we laid in bed and my head resting on his chest, my hand traced his biceps. I looked up at his face, the face that was half hidden and half recognizable because of the moonlight.

"A song? Shawn you know I can't write songs, I've tried. And....... they suck." I said then realizing I hurt his feelings cause he changed the subject extremely fast, which he does when he's hurt.

I'm shocked that was what all started this,  I basically rejected his request and after that is was a snowball affect. It slowly got worse, and we both noticed but not realizing we need to stop it quick or else......... this is what was going to happen. Our marriage being in jeopardy, I never wanted that and I don't think he did either; at least I hope so.

I didn't realize I had been crying for 2 hours just laying on our bed staring at the stars and moon. I heard the front door but not in time to clean myself up, Shawn always walks straight to our room, so I just stayed laying there silently crying to myself.

"(y/n)? Baby, are you okay? What's wrong?" He asked concerned as he put his hand on my thigh sitting down beside me. I looked up at him and saw his sparkling eyes.

"Us........." I took a deep breathe and closed my eyes tightly. "I miss you, us. What happened to us?" I asked as tears were still forming in my eyes and I was barely to speak clearly. He looked down at the ground and then the moon bring his gaze to me on the bed. He picked himself up on his hands pushing himself beside me on the bed. He pulled me into him by my waist.

"I think we both let go, and for no real reason. I think we got lazy and didn't fight for us. And baby I apologize for that, I should have said something. Instead I said nothing, well not entirely. I was writing about it, but I never talked to you about it." I could feel is breathe on my neck, something as simple as that I've missed.

"I'm sorry," I couldn't catch my breathe, I was cold and exhausted. I felt like this 100 ton weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

"I love you." I hadn't said that to him in maybe a month. A month, I didn't show my love for him.

"I love you too baby."

"I'm sorry I hadn't shown my love lately." I said feeling guilty. He pushed himself up onto his elbow looking down on me. He put his hand under my chin bringing my gaze to his.

"Are you kidding? I know we haven't done good lately but baby, you've always made me feel loved. Making me coffee in the morning,  putting a towel in the dryer so its warm for me after I shower, holding me in your sleep, taking my shoes off when I fall asleep on the couch. You've always made me feel loved, and I hope I've made you feel the same." I could hear his voice cracking as he went on with his speak, I felt one of his tears triple down onto my arm.

"You are the most important thing in my life, I would pick you over anyone else any day. You're my person. I wanna show you something." He pulled out his phone.

"I wrote this song a couple days ago, I was really starting to understand what was going on here. These words just started pouring out of me. You've always been my muse and even in our hard times."  He kissed my forehead and played a song.

As I was listening to the lyrics my heart was aching but longing for him too. I pulled him into a hug and didn't let go. Even though we didn't say thousands of words I said all I wanted and drifted off to sleep engulfed in his arms and hearing his beating heart against my ear.

a.n
Hi again!! I really like this one and THIS SONG!! Just imagine this song is the one that shawn wrote for you. Lifehouse has amazing music, they're one of my favs! Kinda wanna start writing a book now too. My book widower is my child and so is strangers but let's be honest here Widower SUCKS! And strangers is still salvageable so we'll see what I do. :)