Deliverance [h.s.]

forty-four | realizations

Do you see something I can't?

Why do you try to save me?

Save Me || Noah Kahan

*************

Harry's P.O.V. 

"Yeah, no; thank you for everything again, I really appreciate it." I replied quietly into the phone, peeking out the closed blinds of the dim room.

"It's no problem, kiddo. How's everything going there?" Steele prodded sincerely.

"It's good, yeah it's okay. She's sleeping right now," I whispered, keeping my voice to a barely audible tone, ensuring not to wake her exhausted body.

I looked over my shoulder to see her silently still, asleep in bed with her hair fanned about the pillow. Even in her sleep her face wore with worry, so much running in her mind she cant even find peace in rest.

"Good, good; I'll keep sending Ty 'round, make sure no one comes by." A weight lifted off my shoulders at the actual genuine fucking kindness of Steele, "Are you still going to come and get the money today?"

"Yeah- Yeah, I'll be by; just gotta make sure Grey's okay. Probably will be closer to tonight, if that's okay?"

"No rush son, ill be in the office all day. Make sure our girl is alright." The sound of papers rustling came through the line as Steele checked his plans for the day, ensuring time for me. "Before you go, uh- tonight; i wanna have a talk with you. It's nothing major, just something that's been on my mind."

There it is, theres his little fucking catch.

I tossed my head back with a silent groan and roll of my eyes. You think after all these fucking years id be used to his bullshit; nope, still fucking catches me by surprise.

"Yep, yep; sounds 'bout right," I monotoned. "I'll see you later on, thanks again."

Pulling the phone from my ear, I ended the call and turned away from the window to check on blue behind me. She was fast asleep, having only gotten to this point maybe an hour or two ago.

Is it possible to be traumatized from the shit I witnessed last night? I mean, like seriously? I feel like i'm for sure fucking traumatized.

Fuck, imagine how blue feels?

To watch someone go through that much torment in one night felt fucking illegal. For her to look so broken but whole at the same time made me want to scoop my eyes out with spoons and wash them with soap to try and get the fucking image out of my head.

I had sat on the couch talking to Mac after she had said she needed to lay down, i regret not getting up the moment she walked away. When i finally got up to go check on her, per Mac's request, she was pacing around the room like a fucking maniac.

"Blue," I knocked on the wooden door, giving it a moment of no response before opening to see her pacing the open floor in front of me. Her hands covering her ears with tangled fists of hair, rapid shaky breathing. "Hey, hey; what's going on?"

I reached out to stop her, but she pulled away as if i had just murdered her fucking family.

Wait, no; shit, thats a bad fucking example.

Like i had fucking eaten the last of her favorite snack, i don't know; that doesn't make any sense.

She looks really hurt, like I'm the cause of her pain. I took another step towards her, but she jumped back, flinching at the mere idea of my presence.