Quirky

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Trauma wasn't quirky, it wasn't fun or cute, it was hell. Sleep couldn't relieve it nor could waking up, whatever he did, he was still the same broken man. A broken man who had to live with himself. Bursts of emotions overtake his body with no way for him to stop them. He didn't have control over his brain or his body, he just existed to be trapped in torment.

This was why he had to take his medication, but Eddy also despised his medication. It wasn't bad, it helped him live with himself. However, he didn't trust it. After all, it was administered by the organization even if it was his prescription. They poisoned his food, raped him, beat him, and put him on the most god-awful missions. He would be damned if he trusted anything they gave him.

Plus how could he pay his pension for being a failure and a murderer if he wasn't suffering for everything he had done wrong. It was what he deserved, for everything.

Eddy picked at his nails, pulling at the flakey skin, ripping it off as Brett searched in the bathroom for where he put his meds. Part of him hoped that Brett wouldn't notice him flaying his fingers.

"Here they are," Brett said as he picked them up from behind the towel stack. It was more than he expected, but at least it would make sense that it was all of them as they were hidden together. He had already asked Ray to be ready to pick up some medication for them on the way to work, wanting Eddy to have the new version. The right version. At least if this was medication Eddy should be having.

He stepped back out into the guest bedroom that had become Eddy's room and showed Eddy the bottles.

"Is this everything?"

Eddy eyed it over then nodded, "Yeah, that's all of them."
He spoke quietly as he stared. He made a conscious choice to try to stop picking at his skin. Eddy didn't want to stress Brett out more than he already was.

"Okay, let's send these off to Ray to get new ones for you, okay?" Brett hummed softly, sitting down on the bed next to Eddy and starting to type a text message with the medication names for Ray to check out. "Do you know... like the dosages you're taking or anything like that?"

"I take one of each, then two for the mood stabilizer," Eddy spoke softly, he looked away from Brett as he began to tap his foot. It helped him focus or something like that.

"Okay, thank you," Brett said, finishing typing it all up and sending it off to Ray. He really hoped he wouldn't find anything that wasn't alright, honestly. Eddy was clearly not well, and medication did seem appropriate.

Eddy nodded a bit, saying you're welcome or it was his pleasure, that didn't seem appropriate. Especially since he didn't feel that way. This sucked! Alex brought it up though so he couldn't hide the fact that he needed meds. Even if that would be what he preferred.

"There we go," Brett hummed, pulling Eddy out of his thoughts. "Maybe you'd like to get dressed in the meantime? I know I do."

Eddy glanced down at himself a bit, almost critically. He was quite critical of himself, not that he would voice it to Brett, "I guess I should get changed."
His current clothes felt like they were sticking to his body from how much he was sweating earlier.

"Do you have anything to change into?" Brett asked, not knowing all about what kind of stuff Eddy had brought. "Or do you need anything washed first? I can do some laundry for you, if you'd like."

"I probably need some stuff washed honestly, but I have some clean clothes still and the stuff you got me," Eddy nodded a bit, he felt gross. He'd have to try to keep up some kind of appearance of hygiene. But he also didn't feel like he had enough energy to actually do anything. Not even enough motivation to make himself wash his face.

"I can do some laundry for you when you're with Alex, no worries," Brett smiled, just happy to be able to do something positive for him. "Just sort out what you want clean before you go and I'll do it."

"Okay, thank you. I can make a little pile or something, " What Eddy really wanted to do was make a cocoon out of blankets and lay in bed. He needed to do something though. Even if he felt like he couldn't. Everything felt overwhelming.

"Yes, that'd be good," Brett smiled as his phone vibrated. He checked it quickly, reading through what Ray was saying.

"I can do that now if you want to go get dressed," Eddy offered quietly, he would like some privacy to get changed too.

"Sounds good to me," Brett nodded, standing up. "I'll come knock when Ray's here with your new meds, okay?"

"Okay, thank you," Eddy wanted to curl up, making it clear to him that he wouldn't be doing anything today. He couldn't bring himself to, even thinking about sorting his clothes out seemed absolutely exhausting.

As soon Brett was up he flopped back on the mattress. He hadn't even picked up the lamp he had knocked over.

"Take care of yourself, okay?" Brett said softly, carefully picking the lamp up and putting it back in its spot before heading for the door. "Just shout if you need anything.""If I need anything I will," Eddy nodded a bit, only addressing that part. He could care less about taking care of himself. That meant he had to get up and straighten up. Whether that was sorting through his clothes, or making himself look presentable. He probably was far from presentable. Eddy hadn't necessarily kept up on his hygiene, so he felt gross - at least Alex cleaned him up - his hair was unkempt, getting all knotted yet sticking up in every direction, and not to mention he felt bloated from eating like a normal person. All in all he felt like he was the most repulsive thing to exist, and not just for his actions. Why was it so hard to feel attractive!? His mind spiraled to places that didn't pertain to anything to their small interaction. Once Eddy noticed that Brett left, he rolled himself up in a blanket and curled up around a pillow. One pillow was in his arms within the cocoon and the other draped over his face. He didn't have to see the demons, if he couldn't see. Sadly, it didn't help him escape the victims etched on the back of his eyelids. 

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