Dear Diary | Chacha

the end of us

                     ~Chapter 118~

Chases POV:

My heart stopped.

I looked her straight in the eyes and I knew she was being serious.

This isn't real.
This isn't real.
It's just a night mare.

Wake up.
Wake up.
Wake up.

None of it is real.
Please Chase just wake up?!
Why can't I just wake up!

It's real.

A single tear fell from my eye.

How could this be happening. We were fine! We were perfect! Everything was great? And now this? I- how- how does that even happen- why?! Why does she want to break up! We are perfect for each other!

I need her. I can't lose her. I can't lose her. She's all I got. I have nothing. Nothing left. I lost everything.

Why am I so unlucky? Why is this happening to me. Why! What did I do to deserve this?

Chase: "what..."

She said nothing, she just laid there and cried and the more I waited the more I knew it was real. I knew I wasn't waking up from this one.

Chase: "but- what did- what happened? Why? Did I do something? I don't get it??"

I did everything right?! I did everything I could so I wouldn't lose her! I couldn't afford to lose her! I was the perfect boyfriend?! I am the perfect boyfriend?!
We can't be over. She said she wanted to marry me a few months ago and now this?? What did I do?

Charli: "I- I'm so sorry"

I stood up and turned on the light

Chase: "we aren't breaking up."

I'm not letting that happen? I didn't do anything! We're perfect!

Charli: "I'm sorry."
Chase: "stop saying sorry! You aren't sorry for anything because we aren't breaking up"

She sat up and slowly walked towards her closet

Charli: "please don't make this harder then it already is for me"

What- she can't- she can't do this to me?

She began taking my clothes off the hangers and putting them in a bag

Chase: "what are you doing..."

What is going on. This isn't happening right now. It isn't, this is my worst nightmare. Why is it coming true?

I walked towards her and she was shaking and crying while putting all my stuff into a bag.
I grabbed her hands and stopped her

Chase: "can we talk about this? Please."

We aren't breaking up. No. We aren't.

Charli: "I can't do this anymore. I want you to leave. Please."

Do what?? I didn't realize this was a chore for her?

Chase: "what did I do Charli? Please tell me so I can fix it?"

Il do anything to fix it?? I just want to know what I did??

Charli: "you didn't do anything and you can't fix it."

Why won't she tell me why she wants to break up.

Chase: "you- you can't just kick me out and never speak to me again"
Tears started rolling down my face

Charli: "I- don't- I don't want to do this"

I grabbed her hands and took a deep breath so I wouldn't cry while talking to her

Chase: "please don't. Please please don't"

I got down on my knees

Chase: "please Charli"
I wrapped my arms around her and cried into her stomach

Chase: "please don't leave me"
I cried harder till I physically couldn't breath

I don't want to breath. I want to die. This is real isn't it? This is real and it's gonna happen? We're over aren't we?

Chase: "I love you so much. We can  work through this"
I sniffled

She put her hands in my hair and took a breath

Charli: "I love you too. Il always love you."

Then why is she doing this... She took the last part of me. I have nothing. I am nothing without her.

Charli: "We're only in high school right... we'll find other people... this isn't supposed to last anyway..."

She did not just say that...
She did not just prove everyone right...

I got off my knees and touched her face, she truly did look so sorry.
It made me even more sad seeing her sad. Even if she was the one breaking up with me, I still sympathized for her.

Chase: "you're all I have..."
Charli: "had"

I put my hands on my face and slide to the corner of her closet. I put my face in my knees and just sat there wanting to wake up.
She sat down next to me and placed her  hand in mine.

Charli: "I- Il- Il always be- I will forever be grateful for what we had... I wouldn't  change any of it. The past 2 years of my life with you have been the best I've ever had... No one and I mean no one has ever cared for me the way you have,  no one has made me feel the way you have, and no one has loved me the way you have. No one has loved me at all. You showed me what love is. You put me back together. And I'm so sorry that I couldn't do the same for you. You fixed me but in the process I broke you. I am so sorry and I am so sorry that I have to do this. I believe that one day we will find each other again, far from now, but one day. But until then, remember how thankful I am to you. This, us, we weren't for nothing. I just hope one day you'll find someone who can put you back together."

I sat there and said nothing. Even though this isn't the death of me, it might as well me. She's right. Im broken, but it wasn't her who broke me.

She laid her head against me

Charli: "one day you'll realize that this was for the best. I promise"
She wrapped her arm around me

I looked up from my knees and looked in the eye

Chase: "is this really what you want..."
Charli: "no. I never wanted this. But it's what I have to do"

I took deep breaths trying not to burst into more tears

Chase: "could I least kiss you... one more time..."

I don't even remember our last kiss. I need to remember our last kiss.

Charli: "yes"

We both wiped the tears off our faces and I looked her in the eye,  I placed my hands on her face then pulled her closer to me. I leaned my forehead against hers
Tears rolled down the both of our faces

Chase: "Il love you forever. I promise."

I slowly pulled her lips to mine abs gave her the best kiss I could knowing it would be our last. Knowing this is where our story finishes.

A/n
aww little does he know, this is only where is begins

Omg, i cant belive next chapter is the second last chapter omg. I cant belive this book is almost done. uhh im gonna miss the characters so much, its been almost a year ive been writting every day about them (if you include love affair)

Chapters left - 2
word count - 1228