Recovery

How It's Going To Be

You're probably going to meet someone who reminds you of me. Someone with the same obnoxious laugh, you enjoys long walks and looking at the sky too much, and the one who picks at her cuticles when she gets nervous. And when you meet her, your eyes are going to lock but little do you know, she's been staring the back of her head for so long, hoping that a pretty blue eyed boy like you would give her the time of day. You're going to give her that smile of yours, the one that flashes all your teeth and makes her wish she was sitting down instead of standing in front of you because her knees are weak, and she doesn't want to trip before you even say a word.

You're going to ask her for her name and ask if you can take her out for a ride in your Chevy truck to a creek where your father used to take you when you were young. And she's going to say yes because who can resist you? I couldn't. Maybe her hair will be longer and probably curlier, or maybe she'll be able to rock that pixie cut I always wish I could have done but I couldn't because my head was too big and my face was too round.

On that date you're going to have so much to talk about because you were always good with small talk and deep conversations. You will both be so drawn to each other that you'll forget the sun was setting until the sky turns dark. Then it will only be you and her, and the stars, just the way you want it. And she'll look into your eyes and hope that you'll lean in and you're worried that she might think you're going a little too fast; that was always your problem, you never believed that someone would want you as much as you wanted them, but I did and so will she.

So kiss her. I am telling you to kiss her. Date her. Hold her. Love her. I want you to love her, but only if she loves you back. And maybe she'll wear glasses like I do and have a beauty mark above her lips. Maybe she will wear sundresses and cowboy boots often and all she'll own in her closet are tons of dressed. And maybe she'll try them on for you. You're going to fall in love with her the way you once fell in love with me and that is okay. Do not worry. It's going to be okay because I have loved you once and you have loved me, and it was quite beautiful. And I think someone else out there deserves the love that you have; and if we ever find each other again one day, then I hope you love me, again.