Recovery

20 Things I Think You Should Know Before You Turn 20

1. Appreciate your dad, you don't know what will happen.

2. If you don't want to wear makeup, don't. For Christ sakes, you're young and beautiful. Society can go fuck their self.

3. It's really okay to love yourself. Appreciate the funny curve of your nose, and that gap in your teeth that makes your smile prettier. Just because you don't look like that girl in the magazine doesn't mean you can't tell yourself you're beautiful every now and then.

4. Do what makes you happy. I know you've heard this a million times, but I can't stress this enough. Go after your dream job even if it goes against everything your parents wanted. If you don't like where you live, move. Your friends don't make you laugh until your sides hurt? You don't have to be friends with them anymore. You're in control. No one else. Don't fall under the pressure of pleasing people. Please yourself and live for you.

5. Love who you want. Regardless of gender, skin color, or societal views. Please never give up on true love because you're scared. Love is a beautiful, beautiful thing, and if you're lucky enough to come across it don't you dare walk away from it because of what others will think. Take the looks, the whispers, and the criticism with a smile, grab your lovers hand, and if you're feeling extra happy, kiss them for the world to see. Let me tell you, the world if only jealous because they simply can't understand.

6. Take long showers and lay on your bed naked after, sing too loud, sleep through your classes one day, and another day just don't leave the couch. It's okay to just decide you don't have responsibilities for a little bit. Everyone needs a day ever so often to just relax. It's okay to be lazy. It's okay to sleep for 12 hours straight. It's okay to go to bed at 6 AM because you're reading and wake up at 3 the next day. Treat yourself, but most importantly love yourself enough to give yourself time to breathe.

7. Alone time is good for the soul. I truly believe that. I think it's good to cancel your plans sometimes, close your door, turn off your phone, and play some John Mayer (or whatever you prefer). Maybe you could read a book, or hell, even write one if you're up for it. But take some time to yourself and learn to be happy with just you and the sound of your breathing. At the end of the day, you are the only person that is guaranteed to stick around, so you might as well learn to enjoy the way you laugh at your own jokes or the way you pronounce words when you read aloud. Being comfortable alone is more important than you know.

8. It's okay to be 20 and still love Disney movies. It's not even a guilty pleasure. Everyone has their favorite whether they admit it or not.

9. Do not compromise who you are to impress someone else. You are a wonderfully constructed individual. Your trials, experiences, and life all together have sculpted you into the most lovely version of you possible. If a person doesn't like the way you live, from your sex life to your music taste, who cares? You were not put on this earth to impress them, or anyone for that matter. Impress yourself. Stick to what you want, stand up for what you believe, and tell people to screw off if they have an issue with any of it. It's your life.

10. High school does not in any manner prepare you for college. One time my teacher dismissed class early because a kid fell down the stairs and he was laughing too hard to continue the lecture. That's all I have to say about that subject.

11. I know you're making a ton of new friends at this stage in your life, but don't forget whose been there from the start. Your new friends may be exciting and wonderful and the best friends you could imagine but the ones that knew you back in middle school and were still there for you are genuine. If they loved you through your awkward phase, they're probably in it for the long run. So send some love their way ever so often. When you're older, you'll be glad you did. 

12. Your mom will probably cry a lot during the next few years. Let her. Hug her. Cry with her. She just wants you to be happy at the end of the day. You're growing up, and life's exciting, but you have to remember that you're her baby, and the more you find yourself, the more she feels she's losing you. I know you're getting older, but so is she. Spend Sunday afternoons telling her about your life or reading her your new poetry. She'll appreciate that so much, and you will too later on. 

13. It's okay to get drunk. Whether it be just for fun or that you need liquid courage to text an ex, it's completely fine. And you know what else is completely fine? Not getting drunk. It's okay to be the mom, the DD, or to not even show up to the party at all. It's all okay. But you know what isn't? Judging whatever decisions your peers make. So what there was a photo posted and that girl you went to high school with was wasted? It's not really any of your business is it. And if that guy decided to go to that poetry reading and skipped the biggest party of the year, it's really not effecting yo at all, so don't act like it does.

14. Stop glamorizing sadness. Sadness is not beautiful. It does not glow. Disorders are not something to make light of, and scars are not something to be ignored. Be proud of you are. Eat that hamburger, and put the razor down. And most importantly, smile. Happiness is by far the most beautiful thing about a person. 

15. It will all be okay at the end of the day. Life has a funny way of working out.

16. Speaking of funny, life literally never goes as planned. Don't waste your time fretting about the future. Faith and destiny work hand in hand to make sure life keeps you on your toes. 

17. Karma is a real and powerful thing. Please try to keep it on your side. Your bad deeds catch up with you in a big way. Take your time to build up your good karma, and do some good for other people, even if the deeds are small. Put a quarter in and expired parking meter, serve food at a homeless shelter, or go visit an elderly person at the nursing homes. Good deeds are good for others, and good for your soul.

18. You can never go wrong with pizza.

19. Don't wish your years away. I know you're at that age where you're responsible for your choices, but aren't really considered and adult but you'll want these years back. Being young is the most fantastic, exciting adventure you will ever endure. And when you get older you'll wish for these years back, even all the bad days that came along with it. So enjoy your youth, relish in it. Because you will never be younger than you are right this second.

20. And lastly, if you ever feel unloved and worthless, just know I love you and find the up-most worth in you. You're destined for big thing, now go get them.