Undeserving Love

Cut it out...

Season09x11

It's been almost two months and a lot has happened. Bailey is now married to the lovely Ben and is now coming back from her honeymoon. Tío has unfortunately lost Adele do to a heart attack on the same day of the wedding, and that also caused a rift with him and my nina. Owen has been distant with me and I have no idea why and to be quite honest I am tired of it. And all this stress made me do something stupid and I cut my hair. So, I've had enough and today I had Xavier take Pablo over to his house for the day and I paged Owen 9-1-1 to my house to get him here since he never answers my calls and texts. I wait and wait until I hear his truck screech to a halt. He comes running into the house out of breath. I sit on the couch watching him. When he finally sees me he runs over and checks to see if I'm ok and I just look at him without moving.

"Bella are you ok." He ask as he cups my face.

I stare straight into his eyes. "Oh so you do care about me?" He looks at me with wide eyes.

"What are you talking about." He moves his hands from my face. His eyes never leaving mine as I stare him down with a hurt glare.

"It's been a month Owen and you haven't talked to me you left me. You ignored me for a month. I would try to talk to you, page you, or have someone else page you for me but you forgot about me. You told me that you would always be there for me and you weren't. You lied to me. I needed you." I tell him as my voice cracks and tears start to sting my eyes.

"I have to go." He starts to get up and walk towards the door.

"Owen sit your ass down right now or te lo juro I will slash your tires." I yell at him as I follow him toward the door. "You have to make a choice."

He looks at me and yells. "I chose the airline. You want me to decide? I choose the airline!" I stopped and watched him push his hands through his hair and sigh. "We had to make a budget cut of 4% and we had a line item of emergency transportation and we never used it and we had a fancy charter company, and I chose a... cheaper one." He pauses, " You want to know why it was cheaper?" His voice cracks.

I walked up to him and cup his face as tears roll down his face. "This is why you left me? Did you think I was going to blame you?" He nods as I wipe his tears with my thumb. "Do you really think so little of me that I would blame you for something like that."

"No I just..."

"You are not responsible for what happened. It is not your fault. You have to understand that."

"But I was the one who signed off on using that company. I was the reason that everyone was on that plane I am the reason you lost Mark-"

"No." I tell him sternly. My tears finally falling. "You are not going to blame yourself for his death. You didn't know it was going to crash. You are not going to carry that weight with you. You don't think that I know that you made those decisions. I know and not once did I blame you for it." I pull his forehead to mine. "It is not your fault and don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise." I whisper to him. "I need you to believe that. Please." I look into his eyes as he look to mine not moving our heads.

"Ok." He grips my hips firmly it's as if he loses his grip I might slip away from him. I wrap my arms around his neck and we stay like that for a minute.

"Ok." I pull my head back and grab his arm. "Now we are going to my room to cuddle and finish watching season 5 of Criminal Minds since you haven't been here all this month. And I'm needing my fix of Hotch and Reid."