mha sick fics (angst)

panic attacks (iideku edition)

(request)
(Tw deeply discussing self harm, not deeply discussing abuse, bullying, panic attacks)
(Please do NOT trauma dump in the comments this is gonna be heavy enough. I will be deleting comments i deem inappropriate or excessively triggering thank you :)

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Izuku had trauma.
He had trauma, the drama, the whole shebang.
You name it, he had experienced it.... Probably.

And, unfortunately, these experiences continued to pile up on the day to day:

Bakugo told him to kill himself, and he had tried.

His mother had beaten him, and he had taken it.

His father left him with his abuser and he delt with it.

For years he had been having breakdowns so severe, he thought he was dying. Several times he had wandered into the ER, and then been calmed down by nurses and told he was having a severe panic attack. When he was in middle school, it was so severe to the point where the local urgent care knew him by name because he came in so often. So many times they had helped him out, free of charge, checked him out just to make sure he was okay and to make him feel better. One day he walked in with a broken wrist and had experienced the worst panic attack anyone in the room had ever had to help with.

Izuku Midoriya never had a good hand delt to him.

From there, CPS was called and everything grew even farther out of his control.

Now, he was with an alright foster family. They didn't hurt him, but they didn't really love him either. He just lived there, but it didn't matter much because he practically lived at UA. Mr. Aizawa took good care of him and so did his boyfriend, Iida.

No one at school knew extensively about his past. Tenya and Aizawa both knew he was in foster care, and Aizawa knew he had been abused in his last home, but he didn't know the extent of anything. No one had told Iida anything, but he was smart enough to pick up that whatever Izuku had been through to get him into foster care was not something to be taken lightly.

He could tell it wasn't a parents not being able to afford, or a custody problem, or anything like that. He knew by Izuku's habits and mannerisms and occasionally strange sayings that he had been through deep shit.

This was absolutely confirmed for Iida when Izuku began to really struggle in school and uddenly his mental health began to plummet.

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Izuku had cut. He'd completely and totally relapsed and they wouldn't close. His arms were littered in cuts fresh cuts. He had never cut on his arms before, especially not once he got to UA to hide his self injury from recovery girl when his quirk inevitably gave him scars or whenever it was too hot for sweatshirts. Usually he cut on his thighs. They were littered with scars, but no one knew about them. No one.

But this was a spur of the moment thing. He had been feeling so unsafe, so panicked, so so so undescribably terrible that he just picked up his closest hidden blade and thrust it into his arm over and over to find some kind of twisted relief. Maybe it was grounding, pain that rooted him to reality, maybe he just felt like he deserved it. They were deep, several were worthy of stitches and he knew that. They hadn't really stopped bleeding under the bandages, but the wraps (though heavy) were enough to stop them from bleeding through to his clothes.

Now, they were teamed up to fight against each other in some training facility on campus to practice strategizing and working together. The goal was to get the entirety of the other team in the cage at the front of the facility.

And now, he was teamed with Ururaka, Tsu, and Mineta against his boyfriend Iida, Bakugo, Jiro, and Momo.

When Iida and Izuku had met up for breakfast that morning, they agreed: