mha sick fics (angst)

fireworks (**not** dadzawa)

Day 1 of convincing everyone to stop fireworks bc it gives me panic attacks bc I was in a mall shooting and now every time I hear a firework I am back on the floor of a truck, covering my head, using my arms as a shield for my head despite the fact that a bullet would tear straight through my flesh and into my skull and I totally wrote a chapter about it bc that's how I deal w every minor inconvenience in my life but it actually didn't fix it bc people were still murdered and I was still left with a mental scar that I will never be able to erase.
#justusesparklers

This is straight up a rant chapter bc the next week is gonna be hell for me as an American
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Pop. Pop. Pop.

Izuku's heart lept out of his chest. Nausea swelled. The room around him faded away until he was back when it was all happening and he wasn't breathing. He was holding his breath.

He had to be quiet. Silent. Unnoticeable.

Every terrified face that passed the window of the truck could have been it. They could have had the gun. They could have aimed the tip at the window and shot them all dead.

There was a stranger in the front seat, scared out of her mind, an immigrant alone working to move her family in with her for a better life. The search for a better life led her to hiding beneath the glove box of his mother's truck.

His mom was stuck in a store somewhere.

Another few pops. Screaming. And through it all the summer sun kept beating down on them into the vehicle. He felt like throwing up.

When he blinked he was back in the common room, hyperventilating on a couch. He had been participating in a conversation with a couple of his classmates. Across from him sat Ururaka, Tsu, and Iida. Next to him was Todoroki.

The conversation had halted when Izuku had mentally left the conversation. He took a shaky breath, but it wasn't deep. He tried again and again and he couldn't breathe.

"Izuku? Are you okay?" Todoroki asked immediately.

Izuku grabbed at his shirt, his chest so tight it hurt. His entire body swelled with heat. His cheeks were hot with panic, his stomache ached and churned with nerves.

"Izuku, hey what's wrong?" Ochaco asked, standing up to be near him.

A single tear dripped over Izuku's cheek. He was frozen, he couldn't move his body. He couldn't inhale, exhale, anything.

"Izuku, you've gotta breathe." Todoroki said seriously, "you have to breathe."

Izuku forced an exhale, but was washed under a huge wave of memory again.

His mom had been texting him when it happened, looking for accessories for his prom outfit, sending him pictures. The dance happened the same night as the shooting. He'd cried and cried in the venue's bathroom. Dancing wasn't fun when you'd survived an event where nine people died a handful of hours ago.

He was pulled out of it by someone touching him. Iida's hand was firmly on his shoulder, "Midoriya, we're here with you. What's going on?"

Izuku just let out a sob, doubling over himself and rocking a bit, "can't breathe." He gasped.

He was attracting a few eyes now.

"Was it the fireworks?" Tsu asked, having observed more than lept in to help. She was good at knowing what to do after taking a step back.

"Fireworks." Izuku said to himself, trying to tell himself he wasn't in danger. To tell himself there were no firearms there to kill him or his classmates.

"You're safe, Kero. There's no guns around here except for Gunhead, and he would never hurt anyone who didn't hurt someone else first." Tsu explained, looking to the others and hinting to follow her lead in reassuring the boy.

"We're all here with you, and we are just fine. So are you, just keep breathing." Todoroki said, helping Izuku sit up again so he could breathe easier. The last thing he wanted was for Izuku to freeze again in a state where his body was trying to inhale and exhale at the same time.

"I assure you safety is the number one priority of us living in campus. No harm will come to you here." Iida said surely, "UA is one of the safest places to live in the entire world. Our security measures are second to none. Not even Tartarus apparently."

"I know b-but my b-body won't stop-" his jaw was clattering, his breathing was irratic, "there's no sh-shooter, but it feels like it's happening all o-over again." He stuttered out, grabbing at his own arms and letting his head drop in exhaustion. He was finally coming down from it.

Ochaco sat down next to him, and wrapped him in a tight hug, "we're here for you, Deku."

And finally, Izuku took a deep, calm breath. He turned his body to hug her back, and soon, the entire group he had been sitting with had wrapped him in a group hug.

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Shortest chapter ever but IDC I will probably delete this in like 24 hours