My Rockstar's World

Chapter 32

"I got a fucking tattoo for you, Gianna," he says while sitting down next to me. It looks like he has pulled his emotions under rein enough.

"I know, but it's not like I asked you to." My eyes shift down to his arm where the tattoo is looking more healed. The "G" sits right on his bicep, and I can only imagine how good it would look when his muscles are flexing as he grips my throat.

"I told you I wanted to. I want you and only you. You've had a bad week? I've been fucking miserable without you. I can't write shit." I can smell the alcohol on his breath now that he's sitting right next to me. It seems stronger than usual. Now in the better lighting, I can see how glazed over this eyes actually are.

"I just," I start to say. "I just told you that I need some time to think. I have a million thoughts going on in my mind."

"I know how to clear you mind," Bawdy says leaning in closer while putting his hand on my thigh.

Does he think that he can just solve the situation by making me cum? I mean, he does make me feel like no one has before.

I build up some self control, although it is difficult, and push his hand away. "You really are not getting this time and space thing, are you?"

He pulls his hand away. "Fuck, Gianna, fine." Bawdy stands up and heads towards the door. "Well, you come find me when you're ready."

Does he really think a few hours at a party are going to be sufficient?

"You're going back down to the party?" It's not like these are even his friends, although I know that no one cares if he's here. People were already going crazy recognizing him.

"I'm already here. Might as well have a good night, and it seems like that won't be happening with you. Enjoy your time to think."

Before I can object, he unlocks the door and walks out, slamming it on his way out. I collect myself and stand up, pulling down the bottom of my dress. I all of a sudden feel cold and too exposed.

If he can go and have fun, then so can I. Tonight is supposed to be all about Iris, and it's pissing me off that he distracted me from her. And Kennedy and I haven't went out together in a bit. Tonight needs to be about my girls and not Bawdy.

I head downstairs.

Well, it might be a bit difficult to have a night that isn't about him. In the short time that he left ahead of me, he's already sitting up on a countertop pouring shots into people's mouths. I think back to the time when I got a shot from him in the crowd at the concert. We shared a special moment together in a crowded room, and he made it seem like we were the only two there.

Now there's a physical and mental distance between the two of us.

I try to shake my thoughts out of my head. I grab a seltzer can and make my way outside. Luckily, I spot Kennedy sitting next to David. As I get closer, I notice that his arm is around her shoulders.

"Hey, I'm back," I say as I approach them.

"There you are!" Kennedy says, motioning for me to sit on the other side of her. "So, um," she begins to ask.

"Nothing I want to talk about right now," I mumble.

I'm sure that she can sense my shift in emotions from before Bawdy arrived to now. She gives me an "I'm sorry" look but doesn't try to pry.

Soon enough, I've had a bit more to drink and am relaxed talking to Kennedy, David, and a few others who are lingering around outside.

I can tell that the party has died down a bit. The music is still blasting, but there are a lot less voices and people going in and out from the house. I spot Iris making her way into the backyard, and we call her over by us.

"Oh, good!" She says while approaching us. I can definitely tell that she is struggling in her heels at this point, but I know she won't take them off and ruin her whole look. It's not like anyone would actually care except her. She says she takes after her older sister who swore by stilettos. "Gianna, Bawdy needs you."

I wrinkle my nose. I didn't explain to her yet that we didn't even come here together tonight. Also, why the fuck did he stay this late. He definitely has better more important places that he could be. "What does he want?" I ask.

"Well, he didn't tell me to come get you," she starts to say. "But, he's like passed out on a couch."

I roll my eyes. "I'll go check on him. Kennedy, you ready to head out soon?"

She agrees and says she'll meet me inside once she says bye to David.

I swallow down a lump in my throat. On one hand, I'm annoyed that he comes to my friend's party and then gets so wasted that he can't even sit up. On the other hand, I'm worried that something is actually wrong with him. I'd like to think that he knows how to handle himself, but I also hope he wasn't mixing shit.

Walking inside, I can see that the party has pretty much cleared out, at least from the dance floor area. It's easy to spot Bawdy slumped over on one of the couches that are pushed up against the wall. I don't even want to deal with him again tonight, but here I go again breaking the whole needing space thing.

I nudge his arm. His head is dandling downwards still, but I can tell that he's breathing. Great to know he didn't fucking die.

"Hey," I say shaking him a bit harder. "Bawdy, come on, get up." He stirs a bit and mumbles something incoherent underneath his breath.

I peak out the window and notice that his limo is parked outside still waiting for him. I try to pull his arm up, but he doesn't budge. It's not like I can just carry him myself.

Rubbing my hands on my eyes, I try to let my frustrations pass. I stop outside and knock on his driver's window, asking him to come help get Bawdy out of the house. It seems like this isn't completely out of the ordinary for his driver, who comes inside to help. Kennedy, Iris, and David are just coming inside and see what I'm dealing with.

"Here, let me help," David says while the driver is attempting to drag Bawdy up. He seems to be somewhat conscious but no where near being able to walk himself.

"Would you like a ride home?" His driver asks before walking out with Bawdy.

I look at Kennedy and shrug. Better than paying for an Uber I guess. "Sure, that'd be great, thank you."

We say our goodbyes and head to the limo where Bawdy is already in. At least he's somewhat sitting up at this point.

The ride home is silent. I can tell that Kennedy and I are ready to go to sleep once we get home. I can still feel the alcohol coursing through me, but I definitely sobered up a bit dealing with Bawdy. He adjusts and lays his head on my lap.

I don't fight it, but I also don't encourage it.