My Rockstar's World

Chapter 65

I make my way back into the crowd with Kennedy and Iris. We stay towards the back to give ourselves time to have some of our drinks, so they don't spill everywhere trying to get through the crowd, which is packed tonight.

Bawdy comes on only a few minutes later. I don't know how he's able to pull himself together so quickly after having me on top of him. I guess that's why he's the professional, and I'm not.

And he looks so good. So good that I wish I would have gave in and let him take me right there backstage. I would have been happy just to have his dick inside of me for five minutes. Would it have left me frustrated and wanting more? Probably, but I'll never fully know how I'd feel unless I try it out.

He knows how to drive me crazy and how to leave me wanting more, but it's also thoughtful that he didn't just want to quickly use me to feel good. I wouldn't have minded being used. Really. He can do whatever the fuck he wants to me.

Him just existing in the same room as me makes me want more from him. Usually, I'm better at taming how horny I am, but I just can't help myself tonight.

His hair is lightly tousled at the beginning, and I take note of how some strands start to stick to his forehead as he continues throughout his performance.

We slowly move up closer until we're in the heart of the crowd. I don't think we're making it any closer unless we want to get squished.

As much as I love watching him up close, it's fun to be lost in the crowd. It brings me back to seeing shows before I really knew him. We went through a lot of shit to get to where we are today, and I wouldn't even change a thing. I'd be too worried that if our relationship came "easier" then we wouldn't be where we are today.

I look over at Iris and Kennedy, and they both look like they're having a great time. Iris has on a loose short dress that is moving and swirling to the music as she dances. Kennedy squeezes my arm and sings lyrics towards me. I'm glad we cleared up that little annoyance that she had with me.

I just want to talk about Bawdy all the time. He already consumes most of my thoughts, so naturally he gets a lot of my words dedicated to him as well. I guess I would get a bit annoyed if someone only ever talked about their boyfriend.

He starts to play his last song of the set. I wonder if everyone else knows that it's his last song of the night. I like to think that I'm special and get to know the set list.

"LA!" Bawdy shouts into the mic. "Who's having a good time?" The crowd roars in response, and I feel a sense of pride inside myself. And tequila. Lots of tequila.

His guitar player starts his solo. Bawdy walks to the edge of the stage. "You guys got me?" He says loudly into the mic.

I'm not the tallest in the crowd, even in my wedged boots, so I have to crane my neck to really see what's going on. Before I know it, Bawdy jumps into the crowd, letting them hold him up. He's on his back crowd surfing, and I can see everyone going wild. They finally hold him in one place towards the front of the crowd. "Get up here!" He shouts in to the microphone.

I look around, and a few others start to get lifted up in the crowd. The excitement of the crowd is palpable. I can feel the energy coursing through my veins. I can't even imagine how Bawdy must feel while performing if I can feel like this just experiencing it.

"Should I go up?" I ask Kennedy and Iris.

"Do it!" Iris says bouncing up and down. Even Kennedy agrees, and she's usually the moral compass of the group. The drinks have probably helped to calm her thoughts.

The two of them can't get me up alone, but some guys next to us must sense what we're trying to do. "Want some help?" One of them asks.

"Yes!" I say while handing my purse off to Kennedy. I grip onto my phone. It's better that I have it if we're going to get separated, and I want a video of myself crowd surfing.

The group of guys easily hoist me up. I can finally see over everyone. The whole experience is surreal as I get moved around in the crowd.

At this point, Bawdy has started singing again, getting to the end of his song while still being held up. He's facing towards the stage, and I'm a bit farther back. I wish that I could see his face right now.

I lean my head back. I can't stop myself from smiling ear to ear, having the time of my life.

Bawdy is brought down and makes his way back onto the stage to finish his last few lyrics. He finishes up with yelling, "See you next time, LA!" Before moving off the stage.

I wonder if he was able to see me up there, but I have been moved more towards the back of the crowd.

His drummer is finishing up a long solo that always closes out the show. I love that he gives everyone else in the band moments to shine.

The lights are bright above, and I start to squint my eyes after looking up into them too much. Lasers are cool until they're directly burning into your retinas.

His drummer hits the last notes of the song, and the crowd goes wild screaming and yelling. I can feel the yells radiating through my body as I'm still being held up. I can see a couple others are still up in the air and are slowly starting to get down.

The crowd continues to scream and chant for Bawdy. I can feel their screams inside of me. They're so loud.

But they're not the only ones screaming.

I start to scream before I even realize fully what's happening.

It's not the bass that I feel thumping against my ears. It's the pounding of my head as I hit the ground.

My eyes are no longer closing from the bright lights. They're closing as I feel myself start to go in and out of reality.

I can't open them.