My Rockstar's World

Chapter 42

It's times like these that I really start to miss my old job. I know it's annoying to be irritated that I have to do work the whole time that I'm scheduled. The pay is a bit better, but I really liked all the downtime from before. I took it for granted, although it was my own actions that lead to me losing that luxury.

I can feel a headache coming on, so I slip into the bathroom to take some Advil when I finally get a second of downtime. I'm not sure if it's from a lack of sleep, stress from school, or not being able to see Bawdy as much. Probably a combination of all of the above. All I know is I've been anxious and feeling like shit this week.

While I'm not supposed to be on my phone at work, they're not going to know if I'm using it in the bathroom. I check the time and give myself a 10 minute limit to pull myself together. For all they know I'm taking a shit in here.

I know that Bawdy is at a work event tonight, so I doubt he'll be able to talk with me. He hasn't replied to my message yet from before work. There's really no reason to bother him.

He would respond if it was an emergency. He's proven that before, but I can't just text him SOS I'm dying from being deprived of you.

My next best bet is to go on social media and scour for pictures of him. Paparazzi work fast to be the first to cover pictures of celebrities at events, so I'm not surprised to find him tagged already in multiple posts. And obsessed fans work even faster.

He looks so good. Too good.

I wish that no one else besides me could look at him.

My stomach churns at the site of him pictured with another girl. I recognize her as another singer. Bawdy had mentioned that they were at least friends, so she's not some random person who he had to attend with. They definitely just had to pose for pictures, but I wish he had his arm around my waist instead of hers. I do feel a bit of relief, since I can tell that he's obviously hovering his hand a bit and not holding on to her like he would with me.

He really took the whole how he takes pictures with girls to heart, and I appreciate him endlessly for that.

I draw my attention away from staring at him. At that point I had zoomed in on just him. I don't need to be looking at some other girl if I don't need to.

And my 10 minutes are up. Twelve actually. It was a long shit, okay?

I make my way back out and paste a smile on my face for my next client. An 8-year-old boy in his baseball uniform. I quickly grab my camera from next to my computer where I was editing the previous client's photos. The shoot is like most of the others that I've been doing, so I'm just working with muscle memory at this point.

Just to make sure the lighting is good, I go to flip through some of the photos that I started to take of the boy. I knit my eyebrows in confusion, because none of the pictures are showing up.

Then my gaze goes to the text on the screen telling me there is no memory card. Shit, I didn't put it back in. I quickly excuse myself and grab the card.

I don't want to sound like an absolute fool, so I just say that the lighting wasn't looking the best. The lighting is actually perfect, so I pretend to move around some lights and only end up moving them a millimeter or two. The mother looks a bit annoyed when I start asking her son to redo poses that he has already done.

It sounds like the boy didn't even want to be there to begin with. At least Ronnie is away at the front desk right now, so he didn't see me being incompetent.

Work wraps up finally, but Ronnie stops me before I head out.

"Gianna, one moment please," he says.